SUNDAY FUNNIES: BARKING AROUND

Barking away

Hello Everybody! Autumn the Puppy here!
After co-hosting with Waxy Dragon for the last two weeks, we had to stop and figure out who's solo turn it was today.
It turned out to be mine but truthfully, I thought it was Waxy's and didn't have anything prepared until our esteemed especially steamed Editor-In-Chief called wanting to know where today's episode was.
Best I can do at the moment is just share with you things I've observed living with people so, on with the show.

Children🧒🧒 really brighten up a household🏡. They never turn the lights off.

Life doesn’t come with instructions🚫.
And even if it did, how many of you would follow them anyway?

A man was going to quit all his bad habits for the New Year, but then remembered nobody likes a quitter.

Some people say that growing up in the 60s was a lot more fun than being in their 60s.
Me? If I'm in my 60s, I never realized my paws🐾 could reach the pedals!🚗

If we were not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light💡 in the fridge?

Have you ever wondered why everyone's looking for Waldo to begin with?
I bet Waldo either owed someone money or is on the lam for some reason.
You don’t get that good at hiding for no reason.
Then again, while others are wondering "Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?", I want to know WHO she is and why I should be so concerned about where she is in first place?

Boy, I really dug up a couple of oldies with that last one, didn't I?
All links were active at the time of posting and on that note♫, have a great week everybody and please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—AtP.

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: FEBRUARY 9-15, 2020

BEWARE THE CORONAVIRUS!

FEBRUARY IS HEART💓 HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH.

FEBRUARY IS AFRICAN-AMERICAN HISTORY MONTH.

FEBRUARY 15 IS THE 55TH ANNIVERSARY OF CANADA’S MAPLE LEAF FLAG.

SERBIA CELEBRATES STATEHOOD FEBRUARY 15.

FEBRUARY 17 IS INDEPENDENCE DAY IN KOSOVO.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…

*The Olympics versus the Coronavirus! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*The Aboriginies get to stay in Australia!
*It will soon be officially illegal to discriminate on the basis of gender or gender preference in Switzerland.
*So much for that idea.
*A grand way to celebrate Valentine's Day!💕
*Can you hear it???

ENGLISH ITEMS...
*Great Britain’s post Brexit e-border might not be ready before 2025!
*Prime Minster Boris Johnson is reshuffling his cabinet. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*Prime Minister Johnson versus American President Donald Trump???

PHILIPPINES’ POINTS…
*Can the Philippines silence the media???
*Is President Rodrigo Duterte reducing alliances with the United States???

CONCERNING CHINA...
*What happened to the reporters???

THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*Stopped before they could get organized.
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…🌐
*BP hopes to achieve ZERO carbon emissions by 2050!

😢PASSING PARADE…
*The growing death toll from the Coronavirus. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Actress Paula Kelly (Soylent Green, Night Court, much more) has taken her last bow on life’s stage.
*Rock poster artist Bonnie MacLean has passed away.
*Actor Patrick Jordan (The Pink Panther Strikes Again, Star Wars 4: A New Hope) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Actress Lynn Cohen (the Broadway stage, Sex and the City, various other TV shows) has taken her last bow on life’s stage.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
THE IMPEACHMENT AFTERMATH...
*Will Trump's post impeachment actions be investigated???
THE BORDER WALL-KIDS-IMMIGRATION ISSUES…

*With families being separated upon apprehension, President Trump declared the lack of a border wall a “national emergency”. There have since been legal and legislative battles initiated over this.
*Which is more important???
*WHAT’S paying for the wall???
*But is the wall effective???
NOTE: While we are doing our best to provide coverage, the above is a serious, ongoing issue. Especially since no one has yet to discuss the costs of separating families and who is truly responsible for the deaths of FOUR detainees (known to date), let alone if anyone might actually be making a profit from this situation.
TARIFF TALK…
*“We warned you!”—Big Oil.
POLITICALLY…
*Is the 2020 Presidential election protected from outside interference???

*Is Trump trying to sway public opinion his way???
*Roger Stone WAS found guilty, but the sentence will be…??? Causing the prosecution team to resign from the case! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Who watches the watchman???
*Was she punished for actually doing her job???
*Is Attorney General Barr responsible for all the recent Department of Justice problems??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*How Trump is considering avoiding another Ukraine “situation”.
*Trump versus Democratic hopeful Mike Bloomberg, Rounds 2 and 3. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Trump versus New York.
*Trump versus John Kelly.
*Trump versus British Prime Minister Boris Johnson???
*He needs the protection, but the bill??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Does Education Secretary Betsy DeVos know???
*February 17 is Presidents Day.
THE NEW HAMPSHIRE PRIMARY… ☑

*The winners and losers.
*What it means for the Democrats.
*From Trump’s perspective.
*No longer in the running: Andrew Yang, Senator Michael Bennett, and Deval Patrick. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
TRUMP TWEETS...
*It’s Anti-Romney time!
*A joke???
*Guess who doesn’t like Trump’s Tweets!
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!✅
*Trump refused to shake hands and the speech was torn up AFTER he gave the State of the Union address. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Was it true???
THE BUDGET BATTLE…💲
*A budget to get re-elected by???
*The problems the proposed budget will cause in regards to health care. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…

*The Senate FINALLY shows some concern!
*But a phone call???
*“You abused your power. Again!”—Nancy Pelosi.
*Hand forcing???
*Attorney General Barr is scheduled to appear before the House of Representatives’ Judiciary Committee March 31.
*Speculation: Will Barr be the House’s next investigation subject??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ELSEWHERE…
*Harvard and Yale: innocent or guilty???
*How NOT to do your job!
*The merger has been approved between the US divisions of T-Mobile and Sprint.
*The 2020 Oscars, for the Best in movies, were awarded to…
*The 2020 Golden Raspberries (aka, the Razzies) NOMINEES, for the Worst in movies, are...
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…
*After all these years
*A super solver!

THE PUZZLE CORNER: FEBRUARY 15, 2020

😎FUN FACT
Our moon🌔 crosses in front of Mars February 18.

RHYME TIME⌛
The clue to something is below, but no matter how long your answer is, each word within it must rhyme. Ready?
V.I.P.

TRIVIA TIME⌚
What famous Aerosmith hit was actually inspired by Mel Brooks’ Young Frankenstein?

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the February 8, 2020 Puzzle Corner.

FAMOUS FIRSTS🥇
Who invented the world’s first official word processor?
Evelyn Berezin.

THE LETTER SHUFFLE
How many new words can you make out of the letters in VALENTINE?
A, alien, alive, an, ant, at, ate
Eat, eave, even, evil
I, in, inn, inane, it
Lane, late, Latin, lean, leave, lei, lenient, lent, lie, line, lint, live
Neat, nine, nit
Tan, tea, ten, teen, tile, tin, tine
Veil, vein, vent, vial, vile
Other words than the 43 listed above might be possible.

VALENTINE'S DAY 2020

The Free Choice E-zine hopes that everyone has a great Valentine's Day, for the world DEFINITELY needs more love (and other positive emotions) than what it has actually experienced in recent years.

And remember, it's not who you love but how you show that emotion, for only you can decide who the right one for you is!

Take care everybody!

SUNDAY FUNNIES: VALENTINE'S DAY 2020

Loves her family

Loves Bubblehead, but don't tell him!

HELLO ALL YOU LUCKY PEOPLE!
Once again you have both Autumn the Puppy AND Waxy Dragon here as we celebrate Valentine's Day.

That's right Autumn. Of course, Valentine's Day actually isn't until this coming Friday the 14th, and luckily it isn't on a Friday the 13th☁, but considering we only work Sundays, this is the closest we can get to celebrating romance this year.

Afraid so Waxy, and considering how much we love💕 jokes, let's get right to them!

What did the stamp 🖃 say to the envelope on Valentine's Day?
I'm stuck on you!

Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable?
Because it's all heart.💗

What do squirrels give for Valentine's Day?
Forget-me-nuts.

What did one volcano🌋 say to the other?
I lava you.

Why did the banana🍌 go out with the prune?
Because it couldn't get a date.

What did the caveman give his wife on Valentine's Day?
Ughs and kisses!

Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?
Because he wanted sweet dreams.

What did the paper clip🖇 say to the magnet🧲?
I find you very attractive.

What did the elephant🐘 say to his girlfriend?
I love you a ton!

What did one pickle say to the other?
You mean a great dill to me.


What did the light bulb💡 say to the switch?
You turn me on.

What did the boy bird🐦 say to the girl bird on Valentine's Day?
Let me call you Tweet heart!

What did the boy cat🐱 say to the girl cat on Valentine's Day?
You're purrr-fect for me!😻

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Atlas
Atlas who?
Atlas, its Valentine’s Day!😍

And on that note♫, have a great week everybody! Show the one you love how much you care about them on the 14th and the rest of the year as well, and please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—AtP and wd.

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: FEBRUARY 2-8, 2020

BEWARE THE CORONAVIRUS!

FEBRUARY IS HEART💓 HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH.

FEBRUARY IS BLACK HISTORY MONTH.

FEBRUARY 8 MARKS THE 110TH ANNIVERSARY OF

THE BOY SCOUTS OF AMERICA.

FEBRUARY 14 IS VALENTINE’S DAY.💕

FEBRUARY 14 MARKS THE 90TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE MALTESE FALCON
BY DASHIELL HAMMETT BEING PUBLISHED.
FEBRUARY 15 IS THE 55TH ANNIVERSARY OF CANADA’S MAPLE LEAF FLAG.

2020 MARKS THE 100TH ANNIVERSARY OF MAIN STREET BY SINCLAIR LEWIS.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…

*The Coronavirus is now a global concern!
*A bank spying scandal???
*Battery Gate???
*Who hacked Facebook’s Twitter account??? (And isn’t it ironic Facebook even HAS a Twitter account!)

THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*A bad “celebration” for Brexit avoided!
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…🌐
*Winters ARE getting warmer! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)

😢PASSING PARADE…
*The growing death toll from the Coronavirus, including Li Wenliang, the man who tried to warn the world about the situation.
*Actor Kirk Douglas (credits too numerous to mention) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Actor Robert Conrad (The Wild, Wild, West; Baa Baa Black Sheep) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*TV producer Gene Reynolds (MASH, Lou Grant, etc) has passed away.
*Actor Kevin Conway (credits too numerous to mention) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Author Roger Kahn (The Boys of Summer) is no longer with us.
*Actor Orson Bean (credits too numerous to mention) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
THE IMPEACHMENT TRIAL!

*Waiting for the verdict vote February 5.
*Censure???
*Recap, February 3: Closing arguments for both sides.
*No "official" action was taken February 4 because of the State of the Union address. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*February 5: Except for Republican Mitt Romney concerning abuse of power, it was 52 Republicans to 48 everyone else, and a true party split (53-47 on obstruction of Congress) in favor of ACQUITTING President Donald Trump on both charges! (There are 5/FIVE separate links in this item.)
*Analysis: What happened???
*How Mitch McConnell pulled it off, but will there be repercussions??? At least one Republican Senator is already receiving death threats! (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*Opinion: What next, as Democrats rally to move forward. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Family reaction.
*“I was acquitted. It was hell, but how dare he vote against me!” (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Speculation: Mitt Romney's impact upon the (immediate) future. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Revenge against Trump’s “enemies”: Adam Schiff, Alexander Vindman, and Gordon Sondland. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*Guess why.
*NOW at least a few Senators gain a conscious!
*Trump's “victory” speech, while defending his actions over "personnel changes". (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*What should the President's powers be???
THE BORDER WALL-KIDS-IMMIGRATION ISSUES…
*With families being separated upon apprehension, President Trump declared the lack of a border wall a “national emergency”. There have since been legal and legislative battles initiated over this.
*Wall construction costs are one thing, but the maintenance fees!
*Policing their own!
*“Dad, hate IS wrong!”
NOTE: While we are doing our best to provide coverage, the above is a serious, ongoing issue. Especially since no one has yet to discuss the costs of separating families and who is truly responsible for the deaths of FOUR detainees (known to date), let alone if anyone might actually be making a profit from this situation.
POLITICALLY…

*Trump versus Bloomberg. Bloomberg replied, and the primaries haven’t even started yet! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*IOWA??? While some are uncertain, Bernie Sanders is claiming the Democratic victory but questions remain, including rethinking the whole process for next time! (There are 5/FIVE separate links in this item.)
*Trump’s opinions on Iowa.
*Donald Trump and the National Anthem!
*Politics and God DON’T MIX!
*Trump may soon be running unopposed for the Republican Presidential nomination.
THE 2020 STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS...
*President Trump gave a campaign speech the 2020 State of the Union address February 4, along with a Medal of Freedom to Rush Limbaugh. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*An opinion on Trump’s gun “control” position.
*Questioning Trump on immigration.
*The House of Representatives initial response.
*Another opinion.
*The GOP versus Pelosi.
*Trump versus “Shredder” Pelosi.
*What’s good for the goose…
*The TV ratings stank.
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!✅
*Impeachment = official indictment on criminal charges. Trial = Kangaroo court acquittal!
*Trump and the economy.
*The New Hampshire Democratic Presidential Candidates Debate.
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*“It’s Obama’s fault!”
ELSEWHERE…

*How NOT to treat a seizure victim!
*Macy’s is planning store closings and layoffs!
*A Beach Boy’s protest.
*A poor attempt at celebrating Black History Month.
*Victoria’s dirty secret???
*While Super Bowl 54 is over, what do you do with the LOSER’S merchandise??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*There is a new nut in town! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*This year marks the 100th anniversary of construction beginning on what would eventually become the Holland Tunnel.
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…
*The Groundhog did NOT see his shadow February 2! Hopefully this means six weeks of good weather and an early spring. (There are 2/TWO links in this item.)
*No more "dolphin🐬 surfing"!
*That toy car is worth HOW much???

THE PUZZLE CORNER: FEBRUARY 8, 2020

😎FUN FACT
💕Romance advice for Valentine’s Day and EVERY day: Pay more attention to your PARTNER than your phone!📵

FAMOUS FIRSTS🥇
Who invented the world’s first official word processor?

THE LETTER SHUFFLE
How many new words can you make out of the letters in VALENTINE?

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX 📦and discover the results from the February 1, 2020 Puzzle Corner.

BEFORE AND AFTER
Two separate items share at least one word, and so can be combined to create something new. Based upon the clue below, do you know what the new thing is?
TARDIS operator on a comedy show.
Doctor Whose Line Is It Anyway?

NUMBER PLEASE
Get ready! We ask the question, but the answer is just a number.
How many opening moves are there for each player in a game of Chess?
20. Each of the eight pawns has the option of up to two squares on its opening move (only one square per move thereafter) and since the Knights can jump over any piece in their way, that adds an additional 4 possibilities.