Sunday, September 21, 2014

SUNDAY FUNNIES: JOKE TIME

Our novel hostess
Hello everybody! Waxy Dragon here!
Afraid I don't have a theme or particular subject to build this weekend's Sunday Funnies around.
Just a lot of great jokes to share. Ready?

What is a sailor's least favorite color?
Maroon.

Did you hear about the concert that only cost 45¢ to attend?
It featured 50 cents and Nickelback.

Why did the stadium get hot after the ball game was over?
All the fans left.

What do you get when you cross a goat with an owl?
A hootenanny.

What did the snail say after he rode on the back of a turtle?
"Wheee! That was fast!"

A slug is just a snail with a housing problem.

Did you hear about the poor farmer who's wife ran away with a tractor salesman?
He got a John Deere letter.


What did the tree say to Autumn (the season, not the puppy)?
Leaf me alone.

What is the only kind of nail a carpenter hates to hit?
A fingernail.

And on that note, have a great week everybody, and please be back here next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!--wd.


Friendly reminder: Waxy's literary debut in Companion Dragons Tales, Volume 2: Finding Waxy by Roger Stegman and Nancy A. Hansen is now available from Amazon in both print and e-book formats.

Saturday, September 20, 2014

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: SEPTEMBER 14-20, 2014

AMONGST EVENTS HAPPENING AROUND THE WORLD THIS PAST WEEK...
*Australia has sent combat forces to Iraq to face the Islamic terrorist ISIL threat after terrorist incidents on their own shores.
*As the Ebola virus crisis grows in West Africa, the United States has agreed to send medical forces and troops to the region, in light of rioting and the killing of medical personnel there. It is estimated over 2500 people have lost their lives to the disease!
*Sierra Leone has decided to lock down the entire country in wake of the Ebola crisis!
*The Philippines fear an eruption of the Mayon Volcano and have evacuated the surrounding area.
*Al-Qaeda terrorists seized control of the Pakistani frigate Zulfiquar, but the Pakistan Navy regained ownership before the terrorists could use it as a weapon.
*Miro Cerar is the new Prime Minister of Slovenia.
*North Korea has sentenced American tourist Matthew Miller, detained since April 2014, to six years of hard labor.
*Fiji's first general election since 2006 resulted in the Fiji First Party winning by a 60% majority.
*Voters in Scotland have decided against seeking their independence from Great Britain.
*Microsoft has announced an agreement to buy the Swedish firm Mojang for $2.5 billion US dollars, which would give them ownership of the Minecraft franchise.

BETWEEN RUSSIA AND THE UKRAINE...
*Ukraine has joined the European Union as an independent country, an act
Russia opposes.
*Fighting between Ukrainian forces and Pro-Russian rebels set the Donetsk International Airport on fire.
*Ukrainian President Petro Poroshenko visited the United States in hopes of obtaining military help against the rebel forces. The US Congress has yet to make a decision on his request.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA...
*The United States Senate has authorized President Barack Obama to spend money equipping and training anti-ISIL forces in Syria.
*It is estimated that by the end of the 2014 calendar year, the United States Congress will have actually "worked" less than six out of the twelve months.
*Democratic and Independent candidates are crying foul against "super pacs" and other supporters pouring enormous amounts of money into Republican campaigns across the country for the 2014 mid-term elections in November after Supreme Court decisions earlier this year seriously changed the election rules.
*Pulitzer Prize winning cartoonist Tony Auth has set down his pencil for the last time.
*Actress Polly Bergen (the original Cape Fear, War and Remembrance) has left life's stage.

For more news at any time, either scroll down to our IN OTHER NEWS feature at the bottom of your screen or visit any other reputable news source.

THE PUZZLE CORNER: SEPTEMBER 20, 2014

FUN FACT
Costa Rica abolished their military and spends the money on education and culture instead.

COMMON BONDS
The items in each subset below have something in common.
Do you know what it is?

01. {The Black Unicorn, The Tangle Box}
02. {A Clash of Kings, A Storm of Swords}
03. {Groups 1 and 2}

AKA (Also Known As)
Theodosia Barr Goodman is better known as what Hollywood legend?

We'll reveal all next weekend, but for now, let's open up THE ANSWERS BOX and discover the results of our September 13, 2014 Puzzle Corner.


TRIVIA TIME: JOAN RIVERS (1933-2014)
What children's television program did Joan Rivers lend her talents to?
She was the narrator for The Adventures of Letterman segments on PBS' original version of The Electric Company.

REBUS
A politically incorrect phrase is represented by the image on the right. Do you know what it is?
Crack pot.
Remember: we did say it was politically incorrect by today's standards.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

SUNDAY FUNNIES: CELEBRITY CITINGS

Hello Everybody! Autumn the Puppy here. Yes, I've been using that tagline for quite a while now, but I'm still a puppy at heart.
Anyway, amongst the people we have lost so far this year, there's been a lot of celebrities. So I thought it would be a neat idea for this edition of Celebrity Quotes (which, thanks to your continued interest, will now be a regular Sunday Funnies bit for me!) where the stars talk about those we lost. Ready?
Hoskins, circa 2007

"Most dictators were short, fat, middle aged, and hairless. Other than Danny DeVito, there's only me to play them."
Bob Hoskins
He played a lot more than the villains. I shall always remember him in Who Framed Roger Rabbit? and deeply regret Hoskins never got to star in a sequel.
Gwynn, circa 2011

"The objective is to be the best player you can be. Remember: play hard and have fun."
Baseball great Tony Gwynn
The man was certainly a legend on the baseball field, and it's a shame he left us way too soon.

Williams, 2011
"You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. Just enough so you don't become stupid. Just a little touch of madness will keep you alive, because no one in the world knows how to tax that. People are kind of like flowers, and it's been a privilege walking in the garden."
Robin Williams, from his debut comedy album Reality, What A Concept
His genius was unsurpassed. His loss to us is even greater.

Garner, circa 1959
"James Garner falls under the heading of 'They don't make them like they used to.' Rest In Peace my friend."
John Stamos
Joan Rivers
His time as Bret Maverick or Jim Rockford in The Rockford Files alone proves that. The rest is just icing on a very big cake.

"My last words? They might be 'But it was a joke.' I'm a comedienne. I was supposed to make people laugh, and I hope I succeeded."
Joan Rivers
She certainly did.
Kasem, circa 1989

"The world will miss Casey Kasem. An incredible talent and humanitarian. We will miss our dad."
Kerri, Mike, and Julie Kasem
"Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars."
Casey Kasem

Truer words were never spoken. We must all strive for our hopes and dreams, but never lose touch with reality.
And on that note, have a great week everybody and please be back here next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!--AtP.

All images via Wikipedia's image sharing rules.

SUNDAY FUNNIES EXTRA: WAXY DRAGON'S FIRST BOOK!

Yes folks, you read the headline right.
Our very own Waxy Dragon is starring in her very first children's book!





MISCHIEF AND MAYHEM BECOME FAMILIAR AGAIN!
COMPANION DRAGONS TALES VOLUME TWO: FINDING WAXY DEBUTS!
Cover art by Kathryn Frizzell

Known as an innovator in Genre Fiction and New Pulp, Pro Se Productions gladly announces the release of the next chapter in its YOUNG PULP! imprint. Authors Roger Stegman and Nancy A. Hansen’s Companion Dragons Tales Volume Two: Finding Waxy! 

“This series,” says Tommy Hancock, Editor in Chief and Partner in Pro Se Productions, “is just straight up fun. This isn’t just a bunch of tales about cute dragons and the heroics they do or the humans around them. This series is a passion for the authors involved. A project they not only have put years of work into since the early days of the internet, but one that has made them close friends. Finding Waxy is the tale that basically started it all and now readers can see why Roger, Nancy, and Lee Houston, Jr. all fell in love with this world, these tales enough to create even more of them that readers will get to enjoy in coming years. Although Companion Dragons Tales: Finding Waxy definitely is aimed at young readers, do not believe for a second that there aren’t enough thrills to excite adults as well. Find out for yourself, you won’t be disappointed.”

Roger 'Rusty' Rustman is a very secretive fellow—and with good reason. He's not only an untrained wizard who uses forms of magic that are frowned upon, and trades in enchanted items that aren't exactly approved of; but he travels to dangerous places that other magical people avoid, and then writes about them anonymously.

From his questionable recreational hobbies he has built a tidy second income along with a stockpile of magical resources. Over the years Rusty has gained a reputation as a shady character who operates on the fringes of the Wizards and Witches Council code of ethics while flaunting Wordsmith Guild regulations; but he's really just a quiet and modest writer mage who enjoys a bit of adventure now and then.

The last thing Rusty needs is a small but very noticeable companion tagging along. Unfortunately, while on his latest trip out to the magical Otherworlds, he finds a very large abandoned egg that decides to hatch unexpectedly in his vacation cabin. That begins an entirely bizarre and mystifying set of events that only the cooperation of a spunky and intelligent little rainbow colored dragon can get him out of safely.

Pro Se Productions proudly presents Companion Dragons Tales Volume Two: Finding Waxy by Roger Stegman and Nancy A. Hansen, a series in Pro Se’s Young Pulp! imprint. This imaginative adventure expands the world of dragon familiars and their humans introduced in the first volume and brings a new voice into the storytelling. Hansen and Stegman weave words like the best wordsmiths they have created, making Companion Dragons Tales Volume Two: Finding Waxy a pure joy for all ages and a great follow up to the first volume: A Familiar Name by Hansen.

Featuring a wonderfully whimsical cover by Kathryn Frizzell and cover design and print formatting by Sean Ali, Companion Dragons Tales Volume Two: Finding Waxy is available via Amazon and in Pro Se’s own store at http://tinyurl.com/m8scuv7 for $9.00. E-Book versions of this entertaining action packed tale are $2.99 each at http://www.amazon.com/Finding-Waxy-Companion-Dragons-Tales-ebook/dp/B00NJX2C42/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1410708610&sr=1-1&keywords=Finding+Waxy .

For more information on this title, interviews with the author, or digital copies for review, contact Morgan McKay, Pro Se’s Director of Corporate Operations, at directorofcorporateoperations@prose-press.com.

For more information on Pro Se Productions, go to www.prose-press.com. Like Pro Se on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ProSeProductions.


Saturday, September 13, 2014

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: SEPTEMBER 7-13, 2014

The Free Choice E-zine would like to thank its loyal readership and fans for giving us not only 3 straight years of continuous 1000+ page views a month (since September 2011), but granting us our first complete year of 2000+ page views a month (since September 2013)!
Without you folks, we are nothing, so from the bottom of our hearts, THANK YOU!


AMONGST EVENTS HAPPENING AROUND THE WORLD THIS PAST WEEK...
*PRODUCTS FROM OVER 900 FOOD MAKERS BASED IN TAIWAN ARE BEING RECALLED AFTER AUTHORITIES DISCOVERED RECYCLED WASTE OIL WAS BEING USED AS LARD!
*Severe flooding between Pakistan and India has caused over 400 deaths, with the Chenab River overflowing its banks.
*Cuba is sending medical assistance to West Africa, where the Ebola Virus outbreak has now claimed over 2,400+ lives!
*The United States has entered the conflict against ISIS, contributing airstrikes to protect the Haditha Dam. Meanwhile, Iraqi forces have announced they will no longer bomb civilian areas, despite knowing that ISIS terrorists intentionally hide in those areas.
*The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have announced they are expecting their second child.
*The remains of a ship from Sir John Franklin's lost 1845 expedition to the Arctic have been found near King William Island, Canada.
*AB Electrolux of Sweden will buy General Electric's Home Appliance division for $3.3 Billion US Dollars.
*NASA's Mars Curiosity Rover has reached its final destination in its originally scheduled exploration mission: the Aeolis Mons within the Gale Crater. Its future after completing its current assignment(s) is unknown at this time.

BETWEEN RUSSIA AND THE UKRAINE...

*The Dutch Safety Board's preliminary report confirms that Malaysian Airlines' Flight 17 was brought down by foreign objects (missiles) striking the exterior of the aircraft.
*Pro Russian rebels have released over 1200 prisoners under a (temporary?) cease fire agreement. The Ukrainian Government has since followed suit releasing their prisoners, although the exact number is unknown.

PASSING PARADE
*Actor Richard Kiel ("To Serve Man" from the original Twilight Zone, Voltaire from The Wild, Wild, West; "Jaws" in two different James Bond movies, etc) has taken his final bow from life's stage.
*S. Truett Cathy, the founder of Chick-fil-a restaurants, has passed away.
*Noted songwriter ("Lady Marmalade") and record producer (Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons) Bob Crewe is no longer with us.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA...
*There is serious concern about an outbreak of respiratory disease amongst children in several states.
*US President Barack Obama addressed the nation Wednesday night with his (immediate) strategy for addressing the ISIS situation in Iraq.
*The United States Congress returned to "work" this past week, but will be taking another break in late October until after the 2014 mid-term elections.
*Gold is currently at a lower price per ounce as the US Dollar grows stronger.
*Professional football running back Ray Rice has been suspended indefinitely from participating in professional football after proof supporting assault charges against his fiancee/wife was discovered.
*Amongst the final results of the 2014 US Open Tennis Championship: Marin Cilic won the Men's Singles, Serena Williams won the Women's Singles, Bob and Mike Bryan won the Men's Doubles, while Ekaterina Karova and Elena Vesnina won the Women's Doubles Tournaments.

For more news at any time, either scroll down to our IN OTHER NEWS feature at the bottom of your screen or visit any other reputable news source.

THE PUZZLE CORNER: SEPTEMBER 13, 2014

FUN FACT
September comes from the Latin word Septem, which means seven. September was the seventh month under the old Julian calendar, which started the new year with what is now March.

TRIVIA TIME: JOAN RIVERS (1933-2014)
This was not known to anyone at The Puzzle Corner or The Free Choice E-zine until reading Joan Rivers' bio after her untimely passing.
What children's television program did Joan Rivers lend her talents to?

REBUS
Although it's not considered "politically correct" by today's standards, what is represented by the image below?


We'll reveal all next weekend, but for now, let's open up THE ANSWERS BOX and grade our SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK! QUIZ from September 6, 2014's Puzzle Corner.

01. When Schoolhouse Rock! first debuted in 1973, they began with Multiplication Rock!, covering the table from "My Hero Zero" to "Little Twelvetoes". But what two numbers were skipped?
A: Although the principles were explained in other songs, Multiplication Rock! never produced songs honoring the numbers 1 and 10.
02. Multiplication Rock! lessons were quickly joined in the weekly rotation
with Grammar Rock! What was the first lesson in that subject?
A: "Conjunction Junction".
03. What group of lessons was added in 1975 in time for the bicentennial of the United States?
A: America Rock!, teaching United States history and government.
04. What subject started debuting lessons in 1979 amongst the existing topics?
A: Science Rock!
05. Although the shortest subject because of the ever changing technology field, Computer Rocks! debuted in 1983 with what two recurring characters?
A: Scooter Computer and Mister Chips.
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6. Sadly, the series went off the air for a while starting in 1985, but when it returned in the early 1990s, it gained a mascot to introduce the segments. Who was this character?
A: Schoolhouse Rocky, who was dressed in a modified version of the costume from "My Hero, Zero".
07. With the series revival, what new subject was introduced amongst the original episodes and new lessons in Grammar Rock!?
A: Money Rock! about financial matters.
08. Sadly, the series went off the air again in 1999 and has only been on DVD (and YouTube) since then. What new subject was covered in a straight to DVD release in 2009?
A: EARTH ROCK! about earth sciences.

It is a shame that this wonderfully entertaining AND educational series of shorts is no longer actively shown or still in production.
To conclude this week's Puzzle Corner, courtesy of YouTube, here is the VERY FIRST Schoolhouse Rock! segment ever shown!
"My Hero, Zero"; Written and performed by Bob Dorough, as first shown on January 20, 1973. ENJOY!