Sunday, June 30, 2024

SUNDAY FUNNIES: JOKES, KODA STYLE (misc. jokes)

 Hello Everybody! Koda Canine here!
Does anyone have any idea what is going on with the weather?
One moment you're hot.🌞
The next you're wet because it's raining☔ like crazy.
Then you need a blanket to sleep with because it gets chilly overnight before getting hot again the next day.
Makes one wonder...
In any event, I thankfully spent most of this past week digging up assorted jokes from everywhere to share with you now while I'm stuck indoors so my fur stays dry. Ready?

When the weather's good I love going outdoors.
It's much safer than going out windows.

If Apple made cars, would they have windows?

I found a great place online to order sausage. I’ll send you a link.

They are making a movie about a semi-truck. The trailer looks interesting.
"Is there a Doctor in the house?"

Where do fortune tellers go on vacation?
Palm Beach.

You should never fall in love with a tennis player.🎾
Love means nothing to them.

OH NO!!!
I’ve lost my ability to be normal!
What should I do?

My people's kids are so open to experiencing culture, they’ll try anything from chicken tenders at a Mexican restaurant to chicken tenders at a Chinese restaurant.

Me: “Am I hungry or bored?”
My Stomach: “Let’s eat until we figure it out.”

Did you know that one actual day on Venus is estimated to last 5832 hours?
The same amount of time as one Monday on Earth.🌎

So on that note♫, have a good week.
Take care.
STAY SAFE!
A HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY to those celebrating Thursday and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!KC.

Saturday, June 29, 2024

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: WEEK ENDING JUNE 23-29, 2024: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS


WE NEED MORE
GUN RESPONSIBILITY
NOW! 

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS AND BURNINGS! 
WEAR YOUR MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

JUNE IS LGBTQ+ PRIDE MONTH.🌈
JUNE IS ALSO WORLD OCEANS MONTH & BLACK MUSIC MONTH.
JUNE 30 IS ASTEROIDS AWARENESS DAY.
JULY 1 IS CANADA DAY.🍁
JULY 2 IS WORLD UFO👽 DAY.
JULY 3 IS BELARUS’ INDEPENDENCE DAY.
JULY 4 IS THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA’S INDEPENDENCE DAY
& REPUBLIC DAY IN THE PHILIPPINES.
JULY 6 IS MALAWI’S INDEPENDENCE DAY.
JULY 7 IS WORLD CHOCOLATE🍫 DAY.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*The COVID state of the world, as of June 29, 2024.
*Archaeologists have made new discoveries in Pompeii and Durrës. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)

*There are 5/FIVE separate links in the header above.


THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…

🌌SPACE NEWS…
*June 30 is Asteroids Awareness Day.
*July 2 is World UFO👽 Day.

😢PASSING PARADE…
*Author and 2013 Nobel Literature Prize winner Alice Munro (numerous short stories over a long career) is no longer with us.
*Actor Bill Cobbs (a plethora of roles from 1974 to 2023) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Professional ice hockey🏒 legend Marty Pavelich has passed away.
*Actor Martin Mull (numerous credits over a long career) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Musician/writer Richard “Kinky” Friedman (a decades long career in music and literature) is no longer with us.
*Surfing🏄 actor Tamayo Perry (multiple achievements and roles) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Film editor/producer/director Bud S. Smith (from 1969’s Putney Swope to 2013’s Alone, Yet Not Alone) is no longer with us.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
POLITICALLY…
*June 28 is the 130th anniversary of Labor Day becoming an official Federal holiday.
🗹ELECTION 2024…
THE SUPREME COURT REPORT…
*After another schedule changing week began, the Court decided not hear a case involving Home Depot. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…

IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
TRUMP’S TRIAL(S)…
The Classified Documents Trial…
*Opinions: Should there be a different judge hearing this important case??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ELSEWHERE…
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…

THE PUZZLE CORNER: JUNE 29, 2024

 😎FUN FACT
Scientists claim to have created a perfume that smells like outer space. Yet, considering its airless vacuum environment, how does someone know what outer space smells like??? Let alone live to tell anyone???

QUIZ TIME!⏳
We all watch them, but do you know what the network acronyms stand for?📺
01. ABC
02. AMC
03. BBC
04. BET
05. CBS
06. CNN
07. CSPAN
08. ESPN
09. HBO
10. NBC
11. PBS
12. TBS
13. TCM
14. TMC
15. TNT
16. TWC

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the June 22, 2024 Puzzle Corner.

BEFORE AND AFTER
Two separate items share at least one word, and so can be combined to create something new. Based upon the clue below, do you know what the new thing is?
Two of a Kind pair. = Olivia Newton-John Travolta, since both ONJ and JT starred in the 1983 movie.

RHYME TIME⏰
The clue to something is below, but no matter how long your answer is, each word within it must rhyme. Ready?
Woodwinds’ problems. = Oboes’ Woes.

Sunday, June 23, 2024

SUNDAY FUNNIES: CITING CELEBRITIES

Hello Everybody! Piper D. Katt here and it's time once again to do some star watching and cite celebrities!
As usual, I will post a real celebrity's actual quote first and then comment on it afterward. Ready?

"If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else." ~~ Yogi Berra.
"No matter where you go, there you are." ~~ Buckaroo Banzai and others.
Men don't get lost. They just find alternate destinations.

“I am only human, and have no doubt that Spock will outlive me by many years. I can only hope that once in a while, when people look at Spock’s visage, they might sometimes think of me." ~~ Leonard Nimoy.
"All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances, and one man in his time plays many parts." ~~ William Shakespeare, from As You Like It.
Professionally and otherwise, humans play many roles in their lives. How you folks keep it all straight is beyond me. I'm just a cat. 😼

"When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. If you listen, you may learn something new." ~~The Dali Lama.
"They would not listen, they're not listening still. Perhaps they never will."~~From Don Mclean's Vincent.
Maybe someday. I've got nine lives to stick around awhile and find out with.

"One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie... is that a cat only has nine lives". ~~ Mark Twain.
So then why lie to begin with? Think of the horrid messes you're leaving us cats!

"Some people have no idea what they are doing... and a lot of them are really good at it." ~~ George Carlin.
While I have never held a "real" job in my life, I've always been under the firm belief that the higher up the success ladder one is able to climb, you're either seriously overwhelmed or else the more brain cells die along the way.

"Too many people spend money they haven’t earned to buy stuff they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like." ~~ Will Smith.
♫Money can't buy me love.♫ ~~ The Beatles.
So why do people bother? They have to stop and smell the roses🌹🌹 and enjoy life the best they can.
Unless they're allergic to roses. Then they might want to stop and smell something else.

So on that note♫ take care.
STAY SAFE!
Have a great week and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!PDK.

Saturday, June 22, 2024

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: JUNE 16-22, 2024: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS

 
WE NEED MORE
GUN RESPONSIBILITY
NOW! 

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS AND BURNINGS! 
WEAR YOUR MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

JUNE IS LGBTQ+ PRIDE MONTH.🌈
JUNE IS ALSO WORLD OCEANS MONTH & BLACK MUSIC MONTH.
JUNE 22 IS WORLD RAIN FOREST DAY.
JUNE 24 MARKS 2 YEARS SINCE
THE US SUPREME COURT OVERTURNED ROE V. WADE.
JUNE 30 IS ASTEROIDS AWARENESS DAY.
JULY 2 IS WORLD UFO👽 DAY.
JULY 3 IS BELARUS’ INDEPENDENCE DAY.
JULY 4 IS THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA’S INDEPENDENCE DAY.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*The COVID state of the world, as of June 22, 2024.
*June 28 is the 120th anniversary of Helen Keller overcoming her diversities to graduate with honors from Radcliffe College.
*Sadly, June 28 is also the 130th anniversary of the onset of what became World War 1 when Austrian Archduke Ferdinand and wife Sofia were assassinated.

THE CHINA CHRONICLES…

THE RUSSIAN REPORT…
*Russian President Vladimir Putin visited North Korea and met with Kim Jong Un. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*What’s the status on that Russian sub that recently visited Cuba??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)

*There are 5/FIVE separate links in the header above.
*Hezbollah has threatened Cyprus if Israel is allowed access to their bases and airports, even if it’s just for military exercises.


THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
*Wildfires plague New Mexico, USA. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*June 22 is World Rain Forest Day.

🌌SPACE NEWS…
*June 30 is Asteroids Awareness Day.
*July 2 is World UFO👽 Day.

😢PASSING PARADE…
*Comedic actor Hiram Kasten (Seinfeld, many other TV shows and stage performances) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Baseball⚾ legend Willie Mays, the “Say Hey” Kid, has passed away.
*Singer, song writer, record producer James “Buzz” Cason (numerous credits over a decades long career) is no longer with us.
*Actor Donald Sutherland (numerous roles over a decades long career) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Actor Taylor Wily (most recent versions of Hawaii 5-0 and Magnum PI) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Film producer and costumer designer Anthea Sylbert (Truman, Chinatown, much more) has passed away.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
THE BORDER WALL-KIDS-IMMIGRATION ISSUES…
*Former President Trump declared a “national emergency” to build his border wall, separating families upon apprehension. President Joseph Biden nullified the emergency, but other matters pertaining to these issues still have to be dealt with.
*The Biden Administration wants to keep qualified families together. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
NOTE: While we are doing our best to provide coverage, the above is a serious ongoing issue. Especially since no one has yet to fully discuss the health and safety of all the detainees as well as the various costs under Donald Trump of separating families and who is truly responsible for the deaths of FIVE detainees (known to date), let alone if anyone might actually be making a profit from this situation.
CAPITAL CHAOS: JANUARY 6, 2021>AFTERMATH
POLITICALLY…
*One look at the Biden Administration and oil prices, along with ongoing efforts to protect pensions. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*June 28 is the 130th anniversary of Labor Day becoming an official Federal holiday.
🗹ELECTION 2024…
*Candidate Donald Trump promised no more aid to the Ukraine if he’s elected. Something those supporting the Ukraine and wanting peace disagree with.
*Opinions: Depending upon who’s elected, what will happen to health care??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
THE SUPREME COURT REPORT…
*Speculations: Are personal conflict brewing between Justices??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*Speculation: Did Representative Matt Gaetz do something illegal??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
TRUMP’S TRIAL(S)…
The Classified Documents Trial…
*Judge Aileen Cannon heard arguments June 21 as to whether or not Prosecutor Jack Smith should be involved in any activity not directly connected to the pending trial, let alone dismissed from the case. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
New York’s ‘Hush Money’ Trial…
ELSEWHERE…
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…

THE PUZZLE CORNER: JUNE 22, 2024

 😎FUN FACT
They may be unsightly and unwanted in gardens, but even weeds produce oxygen.

BEFORE AND AFTER
Two separate items share at least one word, and so can be combined to create something new. Based upon the clue below, do you know what the new thing is?
Two of a Kind pair.

RHYME TIME
The clue to something is below, but no matter how long your answer is, each word within it must rhyme. Ready?
Woodwinds’ problems.

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the June 15, 2024 Puzzle Corner.

REBUS
Something familiar is represented in the image below. Do you know what it is?
His Father Take Take = Takes After His Father

WHO AM I?
Can you identify the person (real or fictitious) based upon the clue below?
♫He’s the military hero of the nation, though he doesn’t always follow regulation.♫
Beetle Bailey, according to the opening lyrics from his 1960s cartoon theme song.

Sunday, June 16, 2024

SUNDAY FUNNIES: HAPPY FATHERS' DAY 2024

Hello Everybody!

Today you have both Piper D. Katt AND Koda Canine here as we celebrate FATHERS' DAY!

That's right Piper and considering what our specialty is, where do Dads get their jokes from?

I don't know Koda. Where do Dads get their jokes from?

From a Dada Base.

So on that note♫, it's joke time!

While it's great when men try to help out around the house, you know they're behind schedule when a pair of summer shorts get stuck to the Velcro of their winter coat in the laundry.

Child: “Do you know what Dad said after he cut his finger?”
“Leave out the dirty words,” the Mother cautioned.
Child, thinks about it for a second then says: “He said nothing.”

When Dads try to tell jokes, are they really funny or some kind of pun-ishment?

Teacher: "What does your father do for a living?"
Student: "He's a mime."
Teacher: "Oh? Is he good at his job?"
Student: "I don't know. He never talks about it."

A child, carrying a really big book📗 asked, “Daddy, why is this book so thick?”
The Dad replied, “It’s a long story.”

Teacher: “How old is your dad?”
Student: “Six years old.”
Teacher: “How can he only be six years old?”
Student: “He wasn’t a dad until I was born.”

So on THAT note♫, remember: being a father is just a matter of biology.
Being a DAD takes time and effort, along with a lot of love and caring.

HAPPY FATHERS' DAY to those celebrating! Have a great week and Piper will be back solo next weekend with more Sunday Funnies!PDK and KC.

Saturday, June 15, 2024

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: JUNE 9-15, 2024: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS

 
WE NEED MORE
GUN RESPONSIBILITY
NOW! 

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS AND BURNINGS! 

WEAR YOUR MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

JUNE IS LGBTQ+ PRIDE MONTH.🌈
JUNE IS ALSO WORLD OCEANS MONTH & BLACK MUSIC MONTH.
JUNE 15 IS NATURE PHOTOGRAPH DAY.
JUNE 16 IS FATHERS’ DAY IN THE UNITED STATES.
JUNE 18 IS INTERNATIONAL PICNIC DAY.
JUNE 19 IS JUNETEENTH. See Social (In)Justice section below for more details.
JUNE 19 IS THE 70TH ANNIVERSARY OF
THE TASMANIAN DEVIL’S DEBUT IN DEVIL MAY HARE.
JUNE 22 IS WORLD RAIN FOREST DAY.
JUNE 24 MARKS 1 YEAR SINCE THE US SUPREME COURT
OVERTURNED ROE V. WADE.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*At the latest G7 Summit in Apulia, Italy from June 13-15... (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*The COVID state of the world, as of June 15, 2024.

THE CHINA CHRONICLES…
*When one country has multiple news items, they will get a separate header that week.

*There are 5/FIVE separate links in the header above.

*The Ukraine will receive more aid from the European Union and the United States. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Will there be peace??? Russian President Vladimir Putin’s proposed peace plan includes the Ukraine surrendering everything they "won" and never entering NATO.

THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
*June 22 is World Rain Forest Day.

🌌SPACE NEWS…
*Although it hasn’t left the ISS yet, Boeing’s Starliner is suffering helium leaks.

😢PASSING PARADE…
*Professional basketball🏀 Hall of Famer Chet Walker is no longer with us.
*Singer-songwriter, actress and model Françoise Hardy (many credits over a long career) has passed away.
*Singer Angela Bofill (♫This Time I’ll Be Sweeter♫, ♫Break It To Me Gently♫, much more) is no longer with us.
*Basketball🏀 Hall of Famer and 1960 Summer Olympics Gold Medalist Jerry West, who was also the inspiration for the NBA Logo, has passed away.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
POLITICALLY…
ELECTION 2024…
*Some complain about President Biden's age, but Candidate Donald Trump turned 78 today. 🎂
THE SUPREME COURT REPORT…
*The recordings of assorted Justices. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*The Supreme Court will not rule against the drug Mifepristone, for now. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…
*On June 19, 1865 Blacks in Galveston, Texas were finally notified they were officially free, despite the fact that the Emancipation Proclamation had been active since January 1, 1863 and the Civil War ended on April 9 of that year. The day has since become a holiday known as Juneteenth.
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
*The size of Candidate Trump’s Las Vegas rally and what he said. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*Donald Trump privately spoke to select Republicans on Capitol Hill June 13. Including his opinions of the Ukraine, Milwaukee and… Taylor Swift??? (There are 4/FOUR separate links in this item.)
TRUMP’S TRIAL(S)…
The Georgia Election Interference Trial…
The Classified Documents Trial…
New York’s ‘Hush Money’ Trial…
Other Trump Troubles include…
ELSEWHERE…
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…