Sunday, November 29, 2009


Hello Everybody! Editor-In-Chief Lee Houston, Junior here.
Ms. Waxy Dragon has the holiday weekend off, but did leave one joke she wants me to share with everyone.

Q. Why did the turkey cross the road?
If you ask the question before Thanksgiving, the answer is: To escape being Thanksgiving dinner.
If you ask the question after Thanksgiving, the answer is: To celebrate not being Thanksgiving dinner.

Either way, I hope the turkey looks both ways before it tries to cross the street.

In any event, I do have two comedy news items to report on.

Robin Williams will have an HBO special scheduled to air December 6.
Even if he just sat on a stool and read old grocery lists it would be hilarious. So I'm sure this event will be a laugh riot, although being on HBO, the content might not be suitable for all viewers.
Check your local listings for specific time and channel.

But something that is age appropriate for everyone is taking the Internet by storm! The Muppets have released their own version of the Queen classic Bohemian Rhapsody that is a big hit on YouTube and other web sites right now.
Starting off with Gonzo and a chicken chorus before Animal takes a beautiful solo turn in the spotlight, the video features Rowlf the Dog on piano and Doctor Teeth and the Electric Mayhem along to rock the house. The video features over 40 Muppets during the course of the song.
Here's hoping that those zany characters decide to do more music videos.

And if you want to see the Muppets version of this tune, while I do not know the legalities of including the video with this post as some websites have done, I have included a link for you to see it directly on the YouTube site at:

How's that for a holiday trifecta? Turkeys, Robin Williams, and Muppets!
Everyone take care and we'll be back next weekend with more Sunday Funnies!

Saturday, November 28, 2009


*President Barack Obama has started procedures to continue military action in Afghanistan, citing a need to "finish the mission over there and not leave it for the next President to deal with". In a related note, Obama's use of the word "unprecedented" seems to be irking some Republicans, especially in regards his administration having to deal with on going problems of the past.
*As civil and political unrest continues in Iran, the United Nations is now concerned about a new radioactive material processing plant being constructed in that country.
*Two would be reality show contestants who shall remain nameless in THIS e-zine managed to crash a White House State dinner November 24. The Secret Service is investigating the matter.
In 1789, what is now North Carolina became a member of the United States of America while in 1889 Washington, along with North and South Dakota joined the Union.
*Police are investigating a recent car accident involving golfer Tiger Woods.
*While Oprah Winfrey might of announced the impending end of her long running television show, this week she announced that she will be starting her own cable network. Some pundits are wondering if she plans to star in and/or host a new program there once it is up and running.
*The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is celebrating its 25th anniversary!
*Comedy fans are looking forward to the impending release of a remastered collection of the Carl Reiner/Mel Brooks classic The 2000 Year Old Man routines.

For more news at any time, just scroll down to the IN OTHER NEWS feature at the bottom of your screen.


Okay Puzzle Fans. It might be a holiday weekend, but that doesn't mean we can't still have fun.

But before we begin, here's a math trick for you.
Everyone knows that one multiplied by any number equals that number (1 x # = #).
But have you ever wondered about the one itself?
1 x 11 = 11, 1 x 111 = 111; etc. But what if there were more ones on both sides?
11 x 11 = 121, 111 x 111 = 12321, 1111 x 1111 = 1234321; etc.
And if one side happens to have an extra 1 you get answers like 11 x 111 = 1221, 111 x 1111 = 123321, etc.
Try it for yourself and see!

Now then, here's an easy(?) TV Quiz for you!
Some shows have acronyms/initials in their names.
Your job is to say what the letters stand for, if you can.

01. Mister D. A.
02. Today's F.B.I.
03. C.S.I. (regardless of what city it's based in)
04. N.C.I.S. (whether the original or the Los Angeles spin off)
05. The Man From U.N.C.L.E.
06. A.E.S. Hudson Street
07. CHiPS
08. M*A*S*H
09. ALF
10. C.P.O. Sharkey

The show titles will be decoded next weekend. But for now, let's dive into THE ANSWERS BOX for the results of last weekend's Puzzle Corner.

While a day of giving Thanks was allegedly held by the Pilgrims upon the first anniversary of their arrival in the New World (America), the idea was first officially proposed by then President George Washington on October 3, 1789.
It wasn't until during the tenure of President Franklin Roosevelt that the date was finalized as the Thursday of the last full week of November.

So how many words could you make out of THANKSGIVING?
With some extra letters available to you (A, G, G, H, I, I, K, N, N, S, T, V) the following are possible: A, Ah, An, Ant(s), As, At, Gag(s), Gang(s), Gas, Gain(s), Giant(s), Gig(s), Giving, Hat(s), Having, Hi, High(s), Hiking, I, In, Ink(s), Inn(s), Is, It, Its (there is no apostrophe for It's), Kin, King(s), Kit(s), Knit(s), Nag(s), Nit(s), Sag, Saint, Saving, Shin, Sin, Sink, Sinking, Ski, Skin, Skit, Snit, Stain, Tag(s), Tank(s), Thank(s), Thin, This, Tin, Van(s), AND Visit.
More than the 70 listed above might be possible.

Thursday, November 26, 2009


As I post this, it is still about ninety minutes from midnight, and a few additional hours away from the start of the 2009 holiday shopping season as a lot of stores and (hopefully) consumers gear up for Black Friday.
In this case, the term is not politically incorrect but, depending upon which theory you believe, refers to either the retailers' hope that their profit margins go from the redness of debt to the blackness of profit; or the more modern theory that the name is derived from the fact that a lot of stores will be open long before sunrise Friday morning!
The average opening time for this event seems to be 4 a.m., with most open by six, although one retailer started advertising late Tuesday night that they would be opening at THREE A.M. when previous ads simply stated "Opening early Friday morning."
Now whether or not this annual sales gimmick works remains to be seen. Pundits theorize that a lot of the consumer base that is planning to shop this holiday season will be going for more basic staples of life instead of the more extravagant/high priced items of the past.
And weather will certainly be a factor in the northern climates, which might keep all but the most ambitious from shopping.

As for me, the only place I intend to be in the wee hours of Black Friday morning is sound asleep in my bed!



Over the years, the thoughts of preparing big fancy feasts, football games, and getting ready for the start of the Christmas shopping season have become part of today.
But let us not forget the TRUE purpose behind this holiday.
It is for taking the time to be grateful for what you have.
A chance to reflect upon and appreciate family and friends.
The opportunity to do something all of us should be doing EVERY day: appreciating life itself!
So regardless of whatever other activities you might participate in today, please don't forget to be thankful.

Thanksgiving 2009

Sunday, November 22, 2009


Hello Everybody! Ms. Waxy Dragon here!

After all the funny dog pictures last weekend, I went looking for some funny cat pictures and found a really great web site called "I Can Has Cheezburger?" at

They have a whole lot of funny cat photos and jokes that I really enjoyed.

There is also a funny dog website called "I Has A Hot Dog" at

Meanwhile, here is another funny dog photo from reader Ann Lopez. I wrote the joke with it.

"And to think, this is the runt of the litter!"
If you have any funny jokes or photos you would like to share, just send them to me in care of my editor at and we'll be back next weekend with more Sunday Funnies.-wd.

Saturday, November 21, 2009


*We begin this review as we did a previous one, apologizing for the delay in posting. Although this time it is so we can announce that the Senate has approved their version of a Health Care Reform Act. Sometime after the Thanksgiving holiday, Congress will convene to unify the Senate and House of Representatives bills into one measure to present to President Obama for consideration.
*One possible aspect of the Health Care Reform Act that is sure to get some attention is a new proposal that elective cosmetic surgery (liposuction, nips and tucks, etc.) should be taxed.
*Meanwhile, the President is still overseas concluding his current foreign relations tour.
*U.S. District judge Stanwood Duval has ruled that because of their negligence in maintaining the levees, residents of New Orleans (especially of the Saint Bernard Parish and the Lower Ninth Ward) have the right to sue the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers for damages resulting from Hurricane Katrina.
*Due to budget cuts, postal workers are no longer forwarding letters to Santa Claus that have found their way to North Pole, Alaska instead of the actual North Pole.
*Although the service was so bad that they had to get their own silverware and napkins, patrons Pope and John Wagner were arrested by police at a Bethlehem, Pennsylvania restaurant for not paying the MANDATORY 16% gratuity! Although given the circumstances, their lawyer thinks the charges will be dismissed when the case is presented before a judge, remind me NEVER to eat in Pennsylvania!
*Did you know that Florida, Utah, Maine, Vermont, Colorado, and Hawaii all have legal restrictions against drying your clothes outside? And many home owner associations in other states are lobbying their lawmakers to pass similar measures? If they don't like the idea, get them to pay the electric bill for the dryers!
*Due to the heavy rains earlier this year, there may be a pumpkin shortage trying to prepare Thanksgiving dinner next week.
*Oprah Winfrey has announced that the end of the current (25th) season will also conclude her long running day time talk show.
*And People magazine has named actor Johnny Depp 2009's Sexiest Man Alive.

For more news at any time, just scroll down to the IN OTHER NEWS feature at the bottom of your screen.


Ah, it's the weekend.
And you know what that means.

With Thanksgiving coming up next Thursday, you're question is: who first proposed the idea of Thanksgiving in America?

A relatively simple one for those with a lot to do in the coming days. How many words can you make out of the letters in THANKSGIVING?

We'll find out next weekend, but for now, let's peek into THE ANSWER BOX for the results of November 14th's Puzzle Corner.

A staple of radio station WSM since its first broadcast on October 5, 1925; The Grand Ole Opry's name was first conceived by announcer George Hay on December 10, 1927 commenting that the country music program was following a presentation of the Grand Old Opera. Before that the show was known as the WSM Barn Dance.

That diverse grouping were all musical guests during the two years (1969-1971) Johnny Cash had his own TV show on ABC.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009


An editorial.

I originally intended to post this article strictly in regards to the latest anti-health care reform propaganda.
On that note, there are now new commercials from organizations with the web addresses and (and with the first word in that e-address, it makes you wonder whose side they are on to begin with), stirring the anti-health care hornets nest; as if the ones allegedly sponsored by the U.S. Chamber of Commerce were not enough. Some of these even target specific Congress members who voted "yes" on Health Care initial reform proposal, urging their constituents to convince these people that they were wrong to vote the way they did.
I wanted to take the opportunity to once again remind everyone that although both the House of Representatives and the Senate have passed a Health Care Reform Act, the two versions must be merged into one cohesive edition to present before President Obama for consideration.

But what brings this post even more urgency is the latest news from a "study" that claims that women now only need a breast cancer screening every other year.
Breast cancer is a serious concern amongst the female population of this planet to even think such a thing.
Isn't an ounce of prevention supposed to be worth a pound of cure?
Wouldn't it make more sense to have a yearly exam than the costs physically, financially, and emotionally of actually fighting the disease?

People: pardon my blunt language, but all the bullshit has to stop!
Think of all the money that is being spend by whoever is trying to at least alter, if not outright prevent, something that potentially will benefit you.
Money that could be put to aid achieving the very objective they are trying to affect.
Now of course, I am not certain who all the "they" involved are, but when you stop and think about it, which would you rather have: the money used to improve a program or the same system you already have?

You are more than welcome to investigate all the information pro and con for yourself.
In fact, I urge everyone reading this to do so and make your own (hopefully informed) opinion.
There are several websites across the Internet where you can gather information and see what is going on for yourself.
And if you want a neutral website for information, I strongly recommend


Sunday, November 15, 2009


Hello Everybody! Ms. Waxy Dragon here!
This week, I want to talk about a subject near and dear to my heart: the Warner Brothers staple (or should that be stable?) of animated characters known as the Looney Tunes, although a lot of the original shorts were also released under the Merrie Melodies banner.

There is much that could be said about these beloved characters. From the early days of the 1930s when in black and white such stars as Bosko, Foxy, and Buddy lead the way before Porky Pig became the first of the group we are more familiar with today, debuting in 1935's I Haven't Got A Hat. But while Porky hasn't been used as frequently as some of the more popular mainstays in recent years, you can always count on him to bring home the bacon when needed.

Sadly, out of all the eligible contenders from each year of active production, only five ever received the Oscar for Best Short Subject: Tweetie-Pie (1947), For Scent-imental Reasons (1949), Speedy Gonzales (1955), Birds Anonymous (1957), and Knighty Knight Bugs (1958).
Meanwhile four others have since gone on to become part of the National Film Registry's preservation program: What's Opera, Doc (1957); Duck Amuck (1953), Porky in Wackland (1938), and One Froggy Evening (1955).

From Bugs Bunny's classic "What's Up, Doc?" to Pepe Le Pew always chasing Le Femme Skunk Fatale, you can always count on these characters for laughs as surely as Sylvester will never succeed in his quest for a Tweety sandwich.

And I'll be back next weekend with more Sunday Funnies.-wd.

Saturday, November 14, 2009


Hello everyone. Everything is back to what passes for normal, so lets get to this week's mysteries.

How did The Grand Ole Opry get its name?

The following all have something in common. Do you know what it is?
{Neil Young, Louis Armstrong, Kenny Rogers and the First Edition, Kris Kristofferson, Bob Dylan}

The answers will appear next weekend. And now, let's peek inside THE ANSWER BOX for the results of last weekend's Sesame Street Quiz.

1. I Love Trash is Oscar the Grouch's theme song.
2. C is for Cookie is the Cookie Monster's favorite song.
3. Rubber Duckie was the one for Ernie, for it made bathtime lots of fun.
4. It's Not Easy Being Green for Kermit the Frog.
5. Frank Sinatra and Ray Charles have also recorded number 4.
6. Sing! was a major hit for The Carpenters in 1973.
7. Snuffleupagus' first name is Aloysius.
8. Rafael was portrayed by actor Raul Julia.
9. The Number (or Mad) Painter was portrayed by actor Paul Benedict.
10. Molly the Mail Lady was actress Charlotte Raye.


*Preparations are being made in New York to try suspects in the September 11, 2001 terrorists bombings admist concerns of security logistics and judicial issues.
*United States President Barack Obama is currently in Asia taking part in an arms reduction summit as he continues to repair America's global standing after eight years of the previous administration's actions.
*After initial fears that the probe sent to the moon back in October of this year was a failure, scientists have discovered evidence that the lunar surface at least had, if not still might have, leaving NASA officials to ponder arranging another manned mission to our planet's lone satellite.
*The infamous parents of the "Balloon Boy" have pleaded guilty to charges in an arrangement with the courts in hopes of avoiding having the mother deported.
*Black Friday may be the looming upon the horizon as the first official day of the 2009 Christmas season, but retailers everywhere have been extending the concept in hopes of driving up sales revenue.
*The 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall was observed on Monday.
*The start to the 40th season of the PBS favorite Sesame Street on Tuesday.
*November 10th also marked the 234th anniversary of what is now the United States Marine Corps, first formed to defend the shores of the thirteen original colonies.
Semper Fi! to all members, past and present.
*Veterans' Day was Wednesday.
*The 2009 Country Music Association awards were handed out Wednesday night. Amongst the winners were Taylor Smith for both Entertainer and Female Vocalist of the Year, Brad Pasley as Male Vocalist of the Year (and both winners co-hosted the event!), and Lady Antebellum as Vocal Group of the Year.
*For those interested, although the CW Network might have been the first by canceling The Beautiful Life just a couple of weeks after it debuted, other networks have since followed suit. The axe has fallen upon Hank and Eastwick at ABC, although it promises the remaining episodes of the drama based upon the movie The Witches of Eastwick will air between December and January. FOX has sadly canceled Dollhouse, although promises to air the remaining episodes. NBC has canceled Trauma and Southland, although TNT has picked up the police drama and will begin airing it from episode 1 to the present starting in January 2010.

For more news at any time, just scroll down to the IN OTHER NEWS feature at the bottom of your screen.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


Today is Veterans Day, whereupon nations everywhere (or should, if they do not already) honor those within their various military branches past and present.
In times of peace and war they have served.
So if you are reading this and enjoy whatever freedoms and liberties you might have today, thank a Vet!

A public service message of The Free Choice E-zine.

Sunday, November 8, 2009


Hello Everybody! Ms. Waxy Dragon here!
Now to say that dogs can be humorous is an understatement. Snoopy, Marmaduke, Odie (from Garfield), Buckles, etc.; have well proven that beyond a shadow of a doubt.
So to celebrate our canine friends, I have decided to post some images of dogs at their funniest, along with some humorous captions I have composed for the occasion.

"Now if I can get a word in edgewise here..."

"The way you drive, why do you think I'm wearing the goggles?"

"Shaken, not stirred." OR, for those suffering from the morning after, "Some hair of the dog that bit ya'!"

"I'm ready for my close up Mister DeMille." OR
"Are you sure you know how to work that camera?"

If you have a humorous image you want to share, just send it to our Editor In Chief Lee Houston, Junior at

Meanwhile, the first image came to me unsigned and the others are from reader Ann Lopez.

And I'll see you next weekend with more Sunday Funnies.
Have a great week everybody!-wd.


Come and play, everything's A-OK, as we celebrate the 40th anniversary of that beloved children's program Sesame Street with a little quiz.

Who sang/sings the following songs?
01. I Love Trash!
02. C Is For Cookie
03. Rubber Duckie
04. It's Not Easy Being Green

Although popular Sesame Street songs, who has also performed the following in other venues?
05. It's Not Easy Being Green
06. Sing! (Sing A Song!)

07. Until he finally decided to make a public appearance, everyone thought Big Bird's friend Snuffleupagus was imaginary. But do you know his first name?

Although Muppets and live actors have intermingled since episode 1, the following characters were portrayed by real people before they became famous. Do you know who were...
08. Rafael, who ran the hardware store before it became Luis' Fix-It Shop
09. The Number Painter (aka The Mad Painter), who was always looking for somewhere to paint the number of the day/episode
10. Molly the Mail Lady

We shall peek inside THE ANSWER BOX next weekend to discover the results, but now, let's reveal just who came to our personal Mad Monster Party to celebrate Halloween during last weekend's Quiz.

01. He's expected, but never appears. H.) The Great Pumpkin of Peanuts fame.
02. He never drinks wine. F.) Dracula, quoting a classic line from the original movie with Bela Lugosi.
03. Despite his appearance, he's friendly. C.) Casper, the friendly ghost.
04. One has to wonder just how well he can play hockey. L.) Jason, from the Friday the 13th horror movie franchise.
05. A multi-faceted being. G.) The Frankenstein Monster, which is the correct name for the creature.
06. Everyone is hoping she doesn't crash the party. B.) Buffy, the Vampire Slayer.
07. He might bring the music. Q.) The Wolfman, and a nod to pioneering Rock and Roll DJ Wolf man Jack.
08. Complains about always having to sweep up afterwards. O.) Witch, with a hint to her alleged transportation, the broom.
09. Despite the name, he's not vampiric. A.) Batman, the DC Comics' super-hero.
10. He may love Christmas, but Halloween is his night! I.) The Grinch, and a direct hint to his second Doctor Seuss story: Halloween is Grinch Night!
11. He tried to steal Christmas too. K.) Jack Skellington, in The Nightmare Before Christmas.
12. Everyone goes to him for advice. P.) Witch Doctor, based on a line from the David Seville (aka Ross Bagdasarian) song.
13. No one knows if he ever does show up. J.) The Invisible Man
14. The other guests complain he's all wet and a social wallflower. E.)Creature from the Black Lagoon.
15. Always wants to rap. M.) The Mummy.
16. The Tally Man. D.) Count Von Count, from Sesame Street.

Saturday, November 7, 2009


*We begin tonight by reporting that The Free Choice E-zine waited until the last possible moment in case there were any developments on our lead story, and at this time we can report that the House of Representatives has decided upon a Health Care Reform Bill. Now their version of the measure will be compared/contrasted to the Senate edition so that one unified document can be put before President Obama for consideration.
*The investigation into the tragic shooting at Fort Hood, Texas continues; and our sympathies go out to the families and friends of those who have either lost loved ones or are waiting for them to recover from wounds received during the incident.
*Stanley Tools has entered into an agreement to buy rival Black And Decker. If the sale is approved, this would make the combined entity the largest tool manufacturer at least within the United States.
*Although we are still weeks away from Thanksgiving itself, many retailers are already starting early Christmas sales events in hopes of stirring up customer interests.
*November 9th marks the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall.
*Wednesday, November 11th is Veterans' Day.
*November 10 marks the 40th anniversary of Sesame Street.
*In England, the BBC has kicked off a celebration for the 20th Anniversary of Wallace and Gromit, although their first film (A Grand Day Out) did not air until December 25, 1989.
*Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin have been announced as the joint hosts for the 2010 Oscar Awards ceremony.
*The American League New York Yankees have won their 27th World Series, beating the National League Philadelphia Phillies 4 games to 2.
*Michael Jordan's son Marcus stuck to his family ties and wore a pair of Air Jordan sneakers while playing for the University of Central Florida's college basketball team, costing the university a premature end to their contract with Adias.

For more news at any time, just scroll down to the IN OTHER NEWS feature at the bottom of the screen.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009


Although this is not a "major" election year, The Free Choice E-zine urges everyone to exercise their civil rights today and GO VOTE!

A public service message of The Free Choice E-zine.

Sunday, November 1, 2009


Did you remember to set your clocks back one hour today?
Daylight Saving Time ended in the wee hours between Halloween night and dawn this morning.
So unless you want to be extra early for everything...

A public service message of The Free Choice e-zine.


Hello Everybody! Ms. Waxy Dragon here!
Boy, I had a great time Trick or Treating last night. I got a lot of candy and if I'm extremely lucky, I might be able to make it stretch and last until breakfast tomorrow morning!
Now of course I did pretty good for a baby dragon (unless you believe that hogwash that I'm really just one amongst many avatars of an avid Internet user). I threw a grey blanket over me and flew around everywhere as a blimp.
Of course I'm not that huge. Or at least I won't be after all this Halloween candy digests.
But I think there have been enough jokes about that poor "balloon boy".
Anyway, although today is technically November 1st, let's see if I can scare up some Halloween jokes for you.

Who is the most famous person in Ireland on Halloween?
Jack O'Lantern.

What kind of a dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound.

What musical instrument do skeletons play?
The trom-bone.

What is a Mummy's favorite musical genre?

What do baby ghosts wear on their little feet?

And as a special treat to all our loyal Free Choice e-zine readers out there, would you believe that this installment of the Sunday Funnies marks the 250th! post since we switched to as our web host?

Well, that's it for this weekend everyone. I think I'm going to call my local Witch Doctor and see what he recommends for a tummy ache.
See you next weekend with more Sunday Funnies!-wd.