Sunday, February 10, 2019

SUNDAY FUNNIES: TAKING IT EASY (misc. jokes)

Hello Everybody! Waxy Dragon here!

I'm just kicking back and taking it easy on a lazy Sunday afternoon. Wish it was much warmer than it actually is so I could go outside and see what mischief fun I can get into...

Anyway, with no particular topic or theme in mind, think I'll just jump into the big ol' bin of jokes I've collected and see what I come up with. Ready?
Waxy's Joke Bin

If it weren't for Venetian Blinds, it would be curtains for all of us.

Why are all the other states Jealous of Nevada?
Because it's the NV of America.

I always behave, just not necessarily well.

For nearly a year I've invested in stocks. Thanks to chicken, beef, vegetable, and shrimp; I will soon be a Boullionaire.

A father lights up the barbecue and says, "Son, it's time to learn how to grill the hamburger."
The boy turns to the hamburger and says, "Where were you on October 11th? Were you alone?"

One bee to another, "How was the Queen Bee's speech?"
"It was the usual. Just a bunch of Buzz words."

The meaning of OPAQUE is unclear.

I don't care what the appliance manufactures claim. The only thing that is truly self cleaning in any house is the cat! 🐈

A guy was taking his girl to the prom. He waits for a long time in line to get a ticket. He then waits a long time to rent a limo. He waits a long time to get the flowers. During the prom, his girl says she would like some punch. He goes to the refreshment table.
No punch line.

I was not sure what was available to use as a replacement for my kitchen work surfaces, so I went to all the different hardware stores, where I engaged in Counter Surveillance activities.

My math teacher said, "Waxy, your homework looks like chicken scratch, but all the answers are correct."
When I got home, I told my friend, "Hey math chicken.🐔 I think they're onto us."

We are not what happened to us. We are what we choose to become.
Never let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do. Take Beethoven for example. They told him he would never be a musician because he was deaf. He didn't listen to them.

And on that note ♫, have a great week everybody and please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—wd.

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