Since Mother's Day was last Sunday, our resident comedienne Ms. Waxy Dragon (one amongst many avatars of an avid Internet user) decided to send in some kids jokes this weekend.
Teacher: If you had five pieces of candy, and Oscar asked you for one, how many pieces would you have left?
Teacher: But 5 minus 1 equals 4.
Student: Maybe. But I don't like Oscar so I'm not giving him any candy.
Camp Counselor: How did you get that horrible swelling on your nose?
Camper: I bent over to smell a Brose.
Camp Counselor: There's no B in rose.
Camper: There was in this one.
Mother: How did you get that black eye?
Son: I was in the kitchen and got caught in a food fight between my older sisters. I'm not sure which one threw them, but I was hit with some tomatoes.
Mother: Tomatoes gave you a black eye?
Son: They were still in the can.
A boy wrote a letter home from camp that said
"Dear Mom and Dad.
Gue$$ what I need? Plea$e $end $ome $oon.
Be$t Wi$he$,Your $on $ammy."
His parents wrote back
NOthing much is happening here.
Please write aNOther letter soon.
Bye for NOw.
Love mom and dad."
Camper: What has six eyes, ten arms, is six feet tall and green all over?
Counselor: I don't know.
Camper: I don't know either, but there's one right outside our tent!
Baby Corn: Mommy, where did I come from?
Mother corn: The Stalk brought you.
See you next weekend with more Sunday Funnies!
And don't forget: August 2nd is the first (Inter)National "Don't Worry!" Day.