Now, as I fly around, I can't help but notice all you humans out and about.
Depending upon where I go, there certainly are a lot of you, so I thought I'd share some of the things I've seen in my travels.
One man was so bored, he said to his friend, "Someday I should get myself a LIFE ALERT bracelet. Hopefully it will alert me should I ever get a life."
His friend replied, "Yeah. I know what you mean. I totally understand how batteries feel too. I'm rarely included in things either."
I once perched on the window of a courthouse and looked inside. One lawyer said to the judge, "I'd like a recess your honor. The witness's pants are on fire."
Never heard the actual testimony before that, but it must have been a real whopper.
A pessimist sees a dark tunnel.
An optimist sees a light at the end of it.
A realist sees a freight train.
An engineer sees three idiots standing in the middle of the track and throws on the brakes.
You can never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.
But unless you're a REALLY great swimmer, I hope you're on a boat!
A man couldn't understand why he got fired from the calendar factory. All he did was take a day off.
Next time I'll send my jokes telepathically, so if you think of something funny out of the blue, that was me.
Meanwhile, have a great week everybody and please be back here next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—wd.