SUNDAY FUNNIES: DIGGING UP JOKES (misc. jokes)

Hello Everybody! Autumn the Puppy here!
Now, it may sound like I'm quoting Game of Thrones, more correctly known as Volume 1 of the A Song of Ice and Fire Saga (and when is George R. R. Martin going to finish that series?) but it's true that Winter IS coming!
So like any good dog, I'm out in my backyard securing my bones🦴🦴🦴 for the winter.
Of course, my people have taken objection to this for some reason I've yet to fathom.
Hey, they've got banks for their money and other valuables, so until there is some other place safe to stash my bones, all I have is the backyard.
Anyway, while taking care of my bone collection, I've dug up some good jokes too.
Ready?

Autumn's backyard.

Researchers have finally crossed a chicken🐔 with a banjo.🪕 They now have a chicken that will pluck itself. 😬

Why couldn’t the pirate learn the alphabet? Because he kept getting lost at C.

You know it's time to clean the refrigerator when something inside closes the door after you're done.😕

Why do humans yell at us dogs whenever we're on the furniture but nobody complains that humans and their recliners go way back?

Anyway, my people are dragging me back into the house now while they fix their yard.
I still don't know what's wrong with it, but they better not touch any of my bones! 🦴🦴
In any event, have a great week everybody and please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies as Waxy Dragon and I team up for our annual Halloween 🎃hi-jinks.—AtP.

THE PUZZLE CORNER: MARCH 30, 2019

😎FUN FACTS
Lou Gehrig played 2,130 consecutive games from 1925-1939 with the New York Yankees before health issues forced him to retire.
Cal Ripken, Jr was asked to stop at 2130 to honor Gehrig, but went on to play 2,632 consecutive games from 1982-1998 with the Baltimore Orioles.

AKA, ALSO KNOWN AS
What tune is more commonly referred to as ♫The Pina Colada Song♫?

THE LETTER SHUFFLE
How many new words can you spell out of the letters in BASEBALL?⚾

We’ll reveal all next weekend, but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the March 23, 2019 Puzzle Corner.

BEFORE AND AFTER
Two separate items share at least one word, and so can be combined to create something new. Based upon the clue below, do you know what the new thing is?

Passionate request to witness a George R. R. Martin event?
Take Me Out To The Ball Game Of Thrones.

RHYME TIME⌛
The clue to something is below, but no matter how long your answer is, each word within it must rhyme. Ready?

Someone who obtains college admission illegally.
Elite Cheat.

BOOK REVIEW: GAME OF THRONES BY GEORGE R. R. MARTIN

Even if you're like me and don't have access to the premium cable channels, most everyone is at least aware of Game of Thrones, the HBO series based upon the books by George R. R. Martin.

However, Game is actually just the first title in the overall series A Song of Ice and Fire. Five have been released, a sixth is long overdue, and the entire story is supposed to go at least seven novels in length.

Originally released in 1996, the three principal story lines feature Lord Eddard Stark being appointed the King's new Hand of Justice after the previous one was murdered; Eddard's illegitimate son Jon Snow being forced to join The Night Watch that guards The Wall to protect the land from a mysterious threat on the other side, since there is no future for him in his father's holdings at Winterfell; and a young girl named Daenerys Targaryen being forced to marry against her will in hopes that her abusive older brother can eventually usurp and claim the crown that he believes is rightfully his.

The above paragraph does not do the novel justice, for there is much political intrigue, drama, and adventure across the land of Westeros on a planet with an unique orbital path that results in years of summer and very extended winters. By the time you have read the final sentence of Game, only two of the ongoing plots have been resolved to any degree, but Martin is such a good writer that you're anxious to start the next novel to discover what happens.

Readers discovering the series today have the advantage of enjoying the first five novels without the long wait between releases, but be warned that there are many twists and turns in the story along the way, and not every character at the beginning will still be alive by the end of the book. As a reader, it's hard not to develop favorites only to see them suffer their literary demise, but such is the way of life and war even in a fantasy series.

I sincerely hope you enjoy the novel as much as I did.

Reviewed by Lee Houston, Junior