SUNDAY FUNNIES: LABOR DAY LAUGHS (misc. jokes)

Hello Everybody!

The Free Choice E-zine's Editor-In-Chief Lee Houston, Junior with you today since your regular hosts Piper D. Katt and Koda Canine have the Labor Day holiday off here in the United States.

It's also Labour Day in Canada, but regardless of how you spell or celebrate the holiday, it's kind of ironic that some of the people this event is supposed to honor have to work.

I can understand those in law enforcement, fire fighting, the medical profession and everyone helping to protect their country's freedoms being on duty. But the rest?

In any event, I've been gathering some appropriately themed jokes for my guest appearance here today, so it's time to have some fun. Ready?

I once worked in a sweater factory.

It was a tight knit community.

The company manufacturing yardsticks are not going to make them any longer.

I just don't understand modern technology.

Facial recognition software can pick a person out of a crowd, but the vending machine at work can't recognize a dollar bill with a bent corner.

It is September already?

I'm still mentally in April with a February To-Do list.

Memory of years past

Interviewer: "We need someone who can do the job of six men."

Woman: "Oh, so it is just a part time position?"

They call it “Man Hours” because a woman would have it done in 30 minutes.

Boss: "Can't you pay attention?"

Me: "I can't. My salary is so low, I can't pay anything."

I wish my wallet came with free refills.

My wallet is like an onion.🧅

I open it and it makes me cry.

♫I owe, I owe. So off to work I go.♫

I blinked on Friday. Now it's Monday.

What kind of sorcery is this?

People wait all day for quitting time.

All week for their day(s) off.

All summer for winter, all winter for summer. And all life for happiness.

Don't let the pursuit of tomorrow diminish the joy of today. 

So on that note♫, take care.

STAY SAFE!

Have a great week and please be back next weekend when Piper and Koda return for their annual Back To School salute on The Sunday Funnies.—lh,jr.

All links were active at the time of posting.

SUNDAY FUNNIES: LABOR DAY LAUGHS

Hello Everybody! The Free Choice E-zine’s Editor-In-Chief Lee Houston, Junior here because The Sunday Funnies’ regular hostesses—Autumn the Puppy and Piper D. Katt—are off since it’s the Labor Day weekend here in the United States of America.

For those unfamiliar with the holiday, the first Monday of the first full week of September is set aside to honor the work force of this country, even if they have to work and don’t get that day off.

In any event, while I have tackled plenty of subjects on holidays past when the ladies were off, I’ve never actually attempted a Labor Day themed column.

Until now. Ready?

(To the tune of ♫The Itsy-Bitsy Spider♫)

The Itsy-bitsy paycheck

Posted to my account.

Down came the bills and wiped the money out.

But I still owe so back to work I go

For the itsy bitsy paycheck, posted to my account.

I am going to travel the world and not stop until I run out of money. I hope to get past the end of my driveway this time.

They claim money is the root of all evil.

Besides not knowing who "they" are, I'd actually like to have some money to see whether or not that claim is true.😉

I told the boss that three companies were after me and I wanted a raise. He asked me what three companies were after me.

I said the electric, telephone, and water.

Interviewer: “The starting pay is $40,000. Later it can go up to $80,000.”

Me: “Okay, I will start later.”

Boss: “Can you work this weekend?”

Me: “Yeah, no worries, but I’ll probably be late as public transportation on a weekend is slow.”

Boss: “What time can you get here?”

Me: “Monday.”

I love having a job. I just hate going to it.

I love being at work. Just not for eight hours a day.

When my boss asked me what I liked best about my job, Apparently coffee breaks, lunch time, and going home were not the right answers.

When you see the overly happy new employee actually enjoying their day at work, tell them when no one from management is around: “We don’t do that here.”

It's easy enough to joke about work. Dilbert and others have made a career of it.

But have you ever wondered where they got some of those company names from?

This link leads to a list of actual, but (intentionally or not) humorous business names.

My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.

So on that note♫, if you have to work any of the holiday…

If you’re in any service: military, police, fire fighters, or medical personnel; WE SALUTE YOU!

If you’re in any other profession, especially retail, and you have to work Monday: SHAME ON YOUR EMPLOYER!

Otherwise, have a great week.

STAY SAFE!😷

Take care and please be back here next weekend when Autumn and Piper return for our annual BACK TO SCHOOL SALUTE on The Sunday Funnies!—lh,jr.