Sunday, June 9, 2013


Want to viaduct?
Ladies and Gentlemen, Autumn the Puppy here.
It slices, dices, Julians, squashes watermelons as good as Gallagher's Sledge-O-Matic.
No one, and I mean absolutely no one, can or should live without some in their lives.
It's the greatest thing to come along since oxygen and water.
I present to you....

The joke.

I'm an independent sales person. I take orders from no one.

My uncle is quite a busy traveling salesman. He always has bags under his eyes.

"Just how old are you?" the lady asked the salesman. "You don't seem experienced enough to sell used cars."
"I'm twenty, plus shipping and handling, along with applicable taxes and licenses. But I've had years of pushing lemons at my lemonade stand over a lot of summers."

"I made some valuable contacts today." is sales person talk for "I didn't sell a dang thing today!"

When your opening sale closes, start opening your closing sale.

"I need new pillowcases," the man told the sales person.
"Yes sir. What size?"
"Err... I'm not sure, but I wear a size seven hat."

A woman was looking over a new line of dresses, but wasn't sure about the new designs. "Are these colors fast?" she asked the sales person.
"I'm not sure," admitted the sales person. "Why don't we chase one and find out."

And on that note, have a great week folks and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!-AtP.

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