One paw typist |
Way back in March, I did a computer themed Sunday Funnies about the perils of tech support.
Since then, I have been asked to do more computer jokes, and have recently compiled enough material to (humorously) discuss the things that consumers must be aware of when purchasing a new system.
Now of course, there's the more obvious things like looking out for any physical damage to the unit or the box(es) before you buy it. Or that the manufacturer replaces the system with the newest model before you even get it home!
But what else is there to be wary of?
*Be cautious that your system requires electricity to operate. While laptops and smaller devices use rechargeable batteries; they do not require gasoline, propane, or alternate energy sources.
*Unless you are intentionally buying an antique for some reason, the external memory should NOT consist of a floppy disc or a notepad and a pen.
*The CD-Rom and/or DVD slots are not drink holders! And if you do insert a disk into your system, while it should disappear when the tray recloses, that action should NOT be followed by a loud burp!
*Also, when you eject a disc, it should not go flying across the room as it leaves the computer.
*The monitor screen should not be showing a blue background before you have even turned the computer on. Blue is the classic color that many early computer users dread seeing. It means your system is having problems, if not an outright crash. If your computer is having problems, suggest a good psychologist. To prevent a crash, take away its car keys and call your computer a cab.
*NOWHERE on the monitor frame should there be the words "Etch-A-Sketch"!
*If possible, ask to take a look at the operator's manual before buying your computer. If anywhere within the entire book(let) are the words "Good Luck!", then you definitely should consider a different system.
*The memory chip(s) within your computer should not be edible.
*The computer mouse should not squeak and eat cheese.
Well, that's it for this weekend. When making a major purchase like this, don't forget to compare and contrast systems and prices between retailers, and ALWAYS hang on to your receipts, just in case.
Have a great week, and please return next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!--AtP.
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