|Love you Mom!|
"That's right Autumn, and we have something very special planned for today: a guest comedienne!"
|Phyllis Diller, circa 2007|
"Phyllis Diller (1917-2012) was one of the first ladies of comedy, breaking into the male dominant field of stand-up performances before turning to humorous acting, and later voice over work for movies and television. Usually in regards to her fictitious husband Fang, Diller joked about marriage and housekeeping, although she had plenty of experience being both a wife and a mother herself."
"And now folks, Autumn and I are proud to present some of Phyllis' classic Mothers' Day themed jokes."
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.
The best way to get rid of kitchen odors? Eat out.
I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford in life. Then I'll move in with them.
Sometimes children threaten to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
We spend the first 12 months of our children's lives teaching them how to walk and talk, and then the next 12 telling them to sit down and shut up.
My cooking is so bad, my kids think Thanksgiving is to commemorate Pearl Harbor!
I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband Fang. How about short and cheap?
Fang's finest hour only lasted a minute and a half.
And on that note, take care everybody and please be back here next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!--AtP and WD.