Sunday, December 26, 2021

SUNDAY FUNNIES: PUN-CTUATION

 
Lee here.
I still have no idea who will be joining Piper D. Katt in the future, although there have been a few worthy candidates for the honor.
In any event, December 26 is both the start of Kwanzaa AND Boxing Day in parts of the world, so I hope that everyone celebrating has a good time.

Now then, let us discuss punctuation.
Among his other talents, Victor Borge had a great routine on the subject that you can see here.
Unfortunately this blog isn't really a verbal medium, so I will have to do it visually.

The basic signs are
Quotation marks. Either ' ', for repeating something somebody already said well after the fact, or " ", for quoting something recently said although nowadays a lot of people don't want to be quoted for legal reasons.
This is a colon : 
This is a semi-colon ;
It hasn't turned pro yet.
This is a comma ,
It's taking a pause to figure out what it wants out of life.
The hypen - – —
Regardless of length, like a colon, semi-colon or comma, it's used to separate words when necessary but needs more space because it won't stand up straight. πŸ˜‰
And this is a period .
It puts a stop to everything, which sometimes is a good thing, but those situations have to be judged on an individual, case by case basis.

Punctuation is used EVERY day, but it must applied carefully.
For example: I love eating grandma and children.
The sentence should have actually been I love eating, grandma, and children.
No cannibalism involved.
Use Punctuation. It saves lives!

But even used properly, there are some odd moments. Like...
Hyphenated. Non-Hyphenated.
Oh, the irony. 😢
Now then, before we go, New Year's Eve is this coming Friday night, with Saturday the start of 2022.
Here's a friendly word of advice.
Just before the clock strikes midnight on December 31st, make sure you raise your left leg.
That way you will start the New Year on the right foot.πŸ˜‰

So on that note♫ take care.
STAY SAFE!😷
And please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!lh,jr.

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: DECEMBER 19-25, 2021

 ♫CHRISTMAS DAY IS IN OUR GRASP,
SO LONG AS WE HAVE HANDS TO CLASP.♫
Lyrics by Doctor Seuss from the original animated version of How The Grinch Stole Christmas.

GET VACCINATED, WEAR YOUR MASK
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

DECEMBER 25 IS CHRISTMAS.
DECEMBER 26 IS BOXING DAY AND THE START OF KWANZAA.
JANUARY 1 STARTS 2022. ARE YOU READY?

AM😷NGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK
*Unfortunately the COVID Variants continue to spread across the world. (There are 7/SEVEN separate links in this item.)
*The Omicron danger IS growing globally! (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*But the vaccination battles continue. (There are 4/FOUR separate links in this item.)
*The state of the world, as of December 25, 2021.
*Unfortunately civil war continues in Syria and Yemen. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*December 25 marks the 1,685th anniversary of the very first (known) Christmas celebration in Rome.
*December 25 is also the 30th anniversary of Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev officially resigning despite the fact that Communist Russia no longer existed.

THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
🌐
*The Monarch ButterflyπŸ¦‹ population has increased. Some.
*FYI: There are coastal areas that accept used Christmas Trees to help rebuild sand dunes along the beach. Check with yours to see if this program is available in your area.
*FYI: Some zoos accept used Christmas Trees to help feed their animals. Check with yours to see if this program is available in your area.

😒PASSING PARADE…
*Actress Sally Ann Howes (Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, lots of TV and stage productions) has taken her last bow on life’s stage.
*Special effects artist Richard Conway (The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, Brazil, more) is no longer with us.
*Actor Nicholas Georglade (original Untouchables, more) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Actor Jack Hedley (James Bond’s For Your Eyes Only, Lawrence of Arabia, more) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Author Joan Didion (The Year of Magical Thinking, 1976 version of A Star Is Born, more) is no longer with us.
*Bluegrass banjoπŸͺ• player J. D. Crowe has passed away.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
THE BORDER WALL-KIDS-IMMIGRATION ISSUES…
*Former “President” Trump declared a “national emergency” to build his border wall, separating families upon apprehension. President Joseph Biden nullified the emergency, but other matters pertaining to these issues still have to be dealt with.
NOTE: While we are doing our best to provide coverage, the above is a serious, ongoing issue. Especially since no one has yet to fully discuss the health and safety of all the “detainees” as well as the various costs under Donald Trump of separating families and who is truly responsible for the deaths of FOUR “detainees” (known to date), let alone if anyone might actually be making a profit from this situation.
CAPITAL CHAOS: JANUARY 6, 2021>AFTERMATH
POLITICALLY…
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE

😷THE US VERSUS COVID-19…
*The Omicron danger IS growing! (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*The toll of fighting COVID. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*Will the Build Back Better program
ever get passed?
??
(There are 4/FOUR separate links in this item.)
*Who is Joe Manchin REALLY representing??? Apparently not the West Virginians who voted for him!
ELSEWHERE…
*December 25 marks the 245th anniversary of then General George Washington crossing the Delaware.
*December 28 marks the 175th anniversary of Iowa joining America as the 29th state.
πŸ˜€AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…


Saturday, December 25, 2021

THE PUZZLE CORNER: CHRISTMAS DAY, 2021

😎FUN FACT
Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol is the most adapted holiday story in any media.

REBUS
Christmas is here and it’s time to celebrate! Do you know what is represented by the image on the right?

TRIVIA TIME
What is the origin of the Gingerbread Man?

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX🎁 and discover the results from the December 18, 2021 Puzzle Corner.


TRIVIA TIME
Four classic Christmas specials have the unique distinction of being shown on television every year since their debut. Can you name the quartet?
In order of their initial appearance: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer πŸ¦Œsince 1964, A Charlie Brown Christmas since 1965, the original Chuck Jones produced Doctor Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas since 1966 celebrating its 55th anniversary this year, and the “baby” of the family: Frosty the Snowman⛄ since 1969.

THE LETTER SHUFFLE
How many new words can you form out of the letters in CHRISTMAS?
A, act(s), ah(s), aim(s), air(s), am, amiss, arc(s), arch, arm(s), art(s), as, ash, ass, at
Cam(s), car(s), cart(s), cash, cast(s) cat(s), char(s), chair(s), charm(s), chart(s), chasm(s), chat(s), cram(s)
Ha, hair, ham(s), harm(s), has, hat(s), hi, him, his, hiss, hit(s)
I, I’m, is, it, its, it’s, itch
Ma, mach, march, mart(s), mash, mass, mast(s), mat(s), match, math, mint(s),mirth, miss, mist(s)
Racism, racist(s), ram(s), rash, rat(s), rich, rim(s)
Sash, sat, scam(s), scar(s), scat, sham(s), shirt(s), Sir, sis, sit(s), smash, smart(s), stair(s), star(s), starch, stash, stir(s)
Tar(s), this, Tis, trash, tram(s), trim(s), Tsar
Besides the 135 words listed above, Chris, Christ, and Sam might be eligible, depending upon your position of counting proper names in a game like this. Other words might also be possible.

Sunday, December 19, 2021

SUNDAY FUNNIES: OUR ANNUAL CHRISTMAS PARTY, SORT OF...

Hello Everybody! Piper D. Katt here and with me is The Free Choice E-zine's own humble Editor-In-Chief Lee Houston, Junior.

As long time readers know, we lost our dear friend Autumn The Puppy a short while ago. It's an ache that still hurts as her absence continues to resound around the TFCE office. I have had the difficult task of interviewing potential replacements, but haven't made a final decision on that subject yet.

In any event, it's the last Sunday before December 25, so here are some appropriate holiday jokes from us to you...

Dumping trash at Christmas time is easy.
Wrap your garbage and leave it on the back seat of your unlocked car when you go to the mall.
Happily, every time you return from shopping, someone will have taken your garbage out for you. πŸ˜‰

Everyone dreams of a White Christmas but, depending upon where you live, Snow is not actually a word.
It's actually an acronym for Stuff No One Wants.❆❄  
It may be fun to watch it fall and to play in, but the clean up afterwards...😟

What do you call Kris Kringle taking a break?
Santa Pause.πŸŽ…

A child managed to stay up and surprise Santa on Christmas Eve.
The kid was even more surprised upon realizing what Santa was leaving under the tree.πŸŽ„
“Oh Wow Santa. A drumπŸ₯ set?”
Santa replied, “Yes. Your parents were naughty this year.”


Would an Artic survey be a North Poll?

What do snowmen⛄⛄ like to eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes.

What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol?
♫Jungle Bells.♫

Why is it cold in a lot of places during Christmas?
Because it's Decembrrrrrrrrr.

And on that note♫
The way the rotation schedule was set up to begin with, I'll be covering December 26 and January 2 while the ladies Piper has the holiday weekends off.
My next scheduled appearance is January 9, 2022 and on January 16...???
Afraid I don't know yet Piper.

But in any event, Take Care.
STAY SAFE! 😷
And please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!PDK and lh,jr.

In memory of our friend Autumn.

Saturday, December 18, 2021

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: DECEMBER 12-18, 2021


 ♫CHRISTMAS TIME IS HERE…
OH THAT WE COULD ALWAYS SEE
SUCH SPIRIT THROUGH THE YEAR.♫
From A Charlie Brown Christmas’ “Christmas Time Is Here”. Lyrics by Lee Mendelson.



GET VACCINATED, WEAR YOUR MASK😷
AND BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

DECEMBER 18 IS NATIONAL DAY IN QATAR.
DECEMBER 18 MARKS THE 55TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE ORIGINAL ANIMATED VERSION OF DOCTOR SEUSS’ HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS.
DECEMBER 21 IS THE WINTER SOLSTICE, THE LONGEST NIGHT OF THE YEAR.
DECEMBER 25 IS CHRISTMAS.πŸŽ„
DECEMBER 26 IS BOXING DAY🎁 AND THE START OF KWANZAA.

AM😷NGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*Unfortunately the Omicron and other COVID Variants continues to spread across the world. (There are 10/TEN separate links in this item.)
*Yet the vaccination battles continues. (There are 5/FIVE separate links in this item.)
*The state of the world, as of December 18, 2021.
*December 25 marks the 1,685th anniversary of the very first (known) Christmas celebration in Rome.
*December 25 is also the 30th anniversary of Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev officially resigning despite the fact that Communist Russia no longer existed.

THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…🌐
*FYI: There are coastal areas that accept used Christmas Trees to help rebuild sand dunes along the beach. Check with yours to see if this program is available in your area.
*FYI: Some zoos accept used Christmas Trees to help feed their animals. Check with yours to see if this program is available in your area.

😒PASSING PARADE…
*The innocent lives lost during the devastating storms of December 11, 2021. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Wanda Young of the Marvelettes has passed away.
*Author Anne Rice (numerous horror novels) is no longer with us.
*Entertainer Vincente “Chente” Fernandez (Gomez) (numerous credits/achievements) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
CAPITAL CHAOS: JANUARY 6, 2021
>AFTERMATH
POLITICALLY…

SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…
*Waitress fired over a tip??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
😷THE US VERSUS COVID-19…

IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
*No “missing” ballots were shipped to South Korea. (Where do they come up with these “theories”???)
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*There are bad politicians in both parties. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ELSEWHERE…
*Were potential victims threatened with termination BEFORE the tornado struck??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*“I don’t want it.”—Dolly Parton to Donald Trump.
*Tiger Woods impending return to golf πŸŒ has been (indefinitely???) postponed! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*December 25 marks the 245th anniversary of then General George Washington crossing the Delaware.
*December 28 marks the 175th anniversary of Iowa joining America as the 29th state.
πŸ˜€AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…

THE PUZZLE CORNER: DECEMBER 18, 2021

😎FUN FACT
Some zoos accept used Christmas TreesπŸŽ„πŸŽ„ to help feed their animals. Check with yours to see if this program is available in your area.

TRIVIA TIME
Four classic Christmas specials have the unique distinction of being shown on television every year since their debut. Can you name the quartet?

THE LETTER SHUFFLE
How many new words can you form out of the letters in CHRISTMAS?

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX🎁 and discover the results from the December 11, 2021 Puzzle Corner.


AKA, ALSO KNOWN AS
Who do we know Rufus Edward Mackahan Senior or Junior better as?
Actor Alan Hale Senior or Junior.

TRIVIA TIME
Any Douglas Adams’ fan knows the ultimate answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything is 42.
But what is the ultimate question of Life, the Universe, and Everything?
“What do you get when you multiply 6 by 9?”

Sunday, December 12, 2021

SUNDAY FUNNIES: OF HUMANS AND CATS

Hello Everybody! Piper D. Katt here.
My people have been busy decorating the house for Christmas.
There's this beautiful treeπŸŽ„ sitting in the living room, all lit up and adorned with everything a Human can imagine putting on a tree to begin with.
Yet my folks tell me it's artificial and I can't go near the darn thing.
Why? It's not like there are any real birds or other goodies on it.
Then again, some of those shiny things dangling from the limbs look like they need a steady feline paw to bat and swat at them.
Just to make sure they're hung properly.
You understand. πŸ˜‰

In any event, Humans and Cats have been together for a mighty long time.

Unlike some people and their parties, especially on December 31 of years past, Cats know how to stay quiet when necessary. After all, you don't want any of us spilling your Human secrets to anyone, do you?
If not, you know where to leave the extra cat food at dinner time. 😼

Momma Meow! Me a Meowrio! πŸ˜‰ Not.
Over the course of Human history, Stone Tablets were replaced by Papyrus and then later Paper Scrolls. Scrolls were replaced by Books. Now you scroll through books on tablets.
What do you do when your fancy devices run low on power?
And have you ever seen anyone line a litter box with one of those gizmos?
I THINK NOT!

The ancient Egyptians used to write on walls and worship Cats.
Today...
You may not be Egyptian, but people are still writing on "walls" and worshipping Cats.
Have we got it made or what? 😸

One of my people's kids recently lost a tooth and got money from the Tooth Fairy.🧚
Now I'll admit I never saw this creature come into the house, let alone switch money for a tooth, but it has got me wondering...
If the Tooth Fairy collects teeth, what does the Boogie Man collect?

Because of this COVID mess, my people have been doing a lot of their Christmas and other shopping online.
Me?
As long as I get the empty boxes and we don't run out of either litter or cat food, I'm happy.

On that note♫, take care everyone!
STAY SAFE! 😷
And please be with us next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!PDK.