SUNDAY FUNNIES: WEEKEND PUPDATE: OCTOBER 2026

 AND NOW IT’S TIME FOR WEEKEND PUPDATE

WITH YOUR HOST KODA CANINE.

Hello Everybody!

I’m Koda Canine and Necessity is the mother of Invention. My family has weird first names.

Our top story:

Spam is considering making their own line of hot dogs.

WHY?😦

In other news...

The Universe has high standards. Earth🌍 is not currently meeting them.

Scientists got bored after watching the Earth turn for 24 hours, so they called it a day.

I wondered where the sun🌞 went at night, then it dawned on me.

The moon🌛 will be seen tonight. That won't happen again until tomorrow night, depending upon cloud cover.

“May you live in interesting times” is now considered a curse in 12/TWELVE different galaxies.

Thanks Earth!

The Earth has won all 74 Miss Universe beauty pageants, to date.

If this world wins the 75th scheduled for November 24, the rest of the universe is threatening military action.

And now, a word from our sponsor.

Our hair growth product is so good, it will grow hair on a billiard ball.

But who wants hairy billiard balls?

Call 555-WEWANTYOUR$

We guarantee the lowest prices in town, no matter how much more you have to pay.

Now, back to what passes for the news.

Historians claim ten minutes after Alexander Graham Bell made the very first phone☎ call in history, Bell received a call asking if he wanted to update his auto warranty.

This just in. There is a potato chip truck blocking the highway. Expect De-Lays.

The recent neck wear contest ended in a tie.

A new study reveals that Little Red Riding Hood wasn’t smart enough to recognize that her grandmother was just a wolf🐺 in drag.

Accordion to a recent survey, many people never notice that the wrong word was used in a sentence.

In Sports…

How many golfers🏌🏌 does it take to change a light bulb?

Fore!

Now it’s time for my editorial.

Why do bags of ice🧊 have nutritional labels?

For that matter, why buy ice when the recipe is just putting water in the freezer until it’s frozen solid.

And finally: 

It’s approaching November and thankfully no one has started singing

Christmas Carols🎄 yet.

But where are the Pumpkin🎃 Carols?

On that note♫, take care.

STAY SAFE!

Have a great week and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies.

For Weekend Pupdate, I’m Koda Canine.

COMING OCTOBER 25:

Koda and Piper D. Katt team up for their annual Halloween👻 Hijinks!

THE PUZZLE CORNER: OCTOBER 18, 2025

 😎FUN FACT

Author Stephen King is not a fan of adverbs.

THE 50/50 CHANCE

Just like a regular TRIVIA TIME question except there are only two possible answers, hence the even odds of getting it right. Ready?

TRUE or FALSE: The Betty Crocker icon is based upon a real person.

BEFORE AND AFTER

Two separate items share at least one word, and so can be combined to create something new. Based upon the clue below, do you know what the new thing is?

A woman’s magazine’s original readership?

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the October 11, 2025 Puzzle Corner.

TRIVIA TIME⌚

Considering you have six chances to guess a five letter word, what are the six possible scores in WORDLE?

01. Genius (which only happens if your starting word is the right answer)

02. Magnificent

03. Impressive

04. Splendid

05. Great (and)

06. PHEW! (emphasis mine)

If you still don’t get it, the game ends with the answer revealed.

COMMON BONDS

The items in each subset below have something in common. Do you know what it is?

01. {The Marx Brothers, Queen} = Both have experienced A Night At The Opera and A Day At The Races.

02 {Jay Garrick, Barry Allen} =Both have been the superhero speedster known as The Flash.

SUNDAY FUNNIES: FALL HUMOR (misc. seasonal jokes)

Hello Everybody! Piper D. Katt here!

It's a fine fall day here as I sit in one of my many sunny spots. A dining room window sill at the moment, but that will change as the day progresses.

Despite the clear skies and the warm sunshine, the days are getting colder as the leaves change colors.

Glad I'm an indoor cat because while they may look fun to romp in as my people's kids are doing right now, you never know what's inside them.

Probably a lot of dirt and mud that I'm better off without.

Cat's eye view

Their dad doesn't look too happy that his children are destroying his precious leaf pile, but then maybe he never should have raked them up to begin with.

After all, they looked like a natural blanket just laying across the lawn.

Of course in time the trees will be totally bare as winter arrives.

But enough of my stray thoughts. It's time for some fun!

My people operated on a pumpkin yesterday.

I didn't even know it was sick.

But they took a lot of yucky stuff out from inside it and now it's kind of hollow.

Considering it never once said "Hello" to me, I thought that pumpkin was kind of empty headed to begin with.

Not sure about sleeping inside the darn thing because it has this weird look on its face now. 🎃

Winter Harvesting

What did the tree say to fall?

Leaf me alone.

Do pumpkin patches repair broken pumpkins?

What do you call a large colorful pile of leaves?

The Great Barrier Leaf.

Why do lions🦁 move at the end of every summer?

Because the pride goeth before the fall!

Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?

To make up for a lousy summer!

And on that note♫, take care.

STAY SAFE!😷

And please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—PDK.

SUNDAY FUNNIES: ASK AUTUMN

Ask and I shall answer

Hello Everybody! Autumn the Puppy here!
We get e-mails all the time here at The Free Choice E-zine office, and today I thought I'd answer a few of them.

Dear Autumn:
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?—A. Chipmunk
That depends on how healthy and in shape the woodchuck is.

How come my socks never stay together between going into the washing machine and coming out of the dryer?—Laundry Lady
I don't know. How was their relationship before they went into the washer?

Dear Autumn:
Is it a good thing to lose your anger sometimes?—I. Hulk
Neurologists claim that every time you resist acting on your anger, you're actually rewriting your brain to be calmer and more loving. Then again, if the barista gets your latte order wrong for the fifth straight day in a row...

Autumn:
Did you know that some dogs in larger cities have figured out how to use the subway system in order to travel to more populated areas in search of food?—Kay Nine.
Sure. Why walk when you can ride?

Snail mail

Why does it take a sloth a whole month to travel one mile on the ground?—Sammy Snail
I don't know. Maybe it has a bad travel agent.

Dear Autumn:
Did you know that DNA only has a 521 year half life, which means that genetic material can't be recovered from dinosaurs and Jurassic Park is impossible.—A. Scientist
Yes I did, but it's called science fiction, not science fact.

Dear Autumn:
I've finally figured out what Victoria's secret is. Do you want to hear it?—Envy.
No, because then it wouldn't be a secret. Besides, a dog wearing lingerie? It's bad enough some people dress us in stupid costumes as it is.

And on that note, if you have any questions or comments about our humble establishment, just e-mail us at FreeChoiceEzine@gmail.com.
But please, NO spam! Waxy may eat spiced ham but I can't stand the stuff.

Otherwise, have a great week and please be back here again next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—AtP.

THE PUZZLE CORNER: OCTOBER 18, 2014

FUN FACT
Lizards communicate by doing the reptilian equivalent of push ups! Body language is everything when they talk to each other.

COMMON BONDS
Everything within each subset is related. Do you know how?
01. {Art Linkletter, Jerry Lewis, Dick Clark, Sammy Davis Junior, Don Ho, Edward G. Robinson, Cyril Lord}
02. {Santa Claus, The Green Hornet and Kato, José Jiménez, Sam Stone from Felony Squad, Colonel Wilhelm Klink from Hogan's Heroes, Lurch from The Addams Family, Suzie Knickerbocker}
03. {Groups 1 and 2}

NEXT?
It's been quite awhile since we've played this last.
All you have to do is figure out what would be next in the sequence below, if you can. Ready?

E, T, T, F, F, S, S, E, ?

We'll reveal all next weekend. But for now, let's open up THE ANSWERS BOX and discover the results from the October 11, 2014 Puzzle Corner.

LINKED WORDS
The last letter of each correct response started the next answer, with the correct response starting the first answer.
01. Alien craft = UfO
02. Classic musicals = OperaS
03. Pig dinner = SloP
04. Rhyming writer = PoeT
05. Ballet wear = TutU

TRIVIA TIME
Wile E. Coyote's middle name was never given in any Looney Tunes or Merrie Melodies film. His name was a play on the word Wily; although one comic book appearance claimed the E. stood for Ethelbert.